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Bereavement

So sad

5 replies

mynameisnotmichaelcaine · 11/02/2014 07:19

DD's birthday yesterday. She is getting so grown up, nearly time for secondary school, and my Mum never met her. She died 6 weeks before DD was born. I've been crying all morning - managed to hold it together yesterday. It's not fair. Mum was a childminder who spent the last decades of her life caring for babies, but she never met her three grandbabies. I know there's nothing much to be said, but wanted to post where people will understand.

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JeanSeberg · 11/02/2014 13:40

Sorry to hear about your loss, myname. It's really sad that your mum never got to meet her grandchildren. My dad never met my 3 sons either and I often wonder what he would have made of them all, even more so as they've all grown up.

Do you have some keepsakes from your mum about the house and photos? I'm sure you keep her memory alive with your children.

I'm not particularly religious but I often think about my mum and dad looking down on us all and that helps to feel that they've not really left.

Thanks for you, take care.

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drivinmecrazy · 11/02/2014 13:52

I was very fortunate. My DF did meet my DDs and shared their early years. But it's still so bitter sweet when one or other does or says something I know my DF would have loved.
DD2 was too young to have her own memories of my DF, but he's ever present in her life, through stories I tell her and pictures we share.
I have a special memory box which I bring out once in a while. It has in it letters and notes he sent me when I was a child and photos going back to when he was a baby. DD2 loves sharing my memories of him and hearing my stories. She feels very close to him, though they didn't have the time to build a proper relationship.
my DD1 does remember my Dad, vividly. It is too painful for her to share my memory box, nearly 5 years on.

I think we will always have moments when we feel their loss greater than others. But how wonderful that their legacy lives on through their Grandchildren

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mumofthemonsters808 · 11/02/2014 13:56

I know how you feel OP, it is so hard to accept the way things are. My parents are both gone and I feel so sad, almost cheated that they never got to meet my children. Sometimes, I'm even jealous of people whose children have Grandparents. Sometimes I even imagine what they would be all doing together and create an image in my head of them all having fun together. This feeling does not seem to be leaving me, it just creeps in at the most unexpected moment. One thing I have always done is talk about them and share my funny stories about how lovely they were.

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JeanSeberg · 11/02/2014 13:56

That's a lovely post drivinmecrazy. You are right that so much lives on through their grandchildren.

It makes me smile that my eldest son (18) is doing exactly the same degree that my dad did. He's even taken some of my dad's old course books that we discovered recently so you're right lots of things continue.

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mynameisnotmichaelcaine · 11/02/2014 21:38

Thanks all. It's horrid when these overwhelming feelings creep up on you.

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