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My husband died

(197 Posts)
minkulus Fri 05-Apr-13 22:09:22

I have 2DCs. Daughter 8 and son 2 1/2. I have spoken to my Dd about her daddy, but how the hell do I explain it to the 2 yr old.
Dad was away a lot with work so his absence has not been noted yet. What do I do?
Sorry it's a bit blunt but I'm stunned and can't face it.

DontSHOUTTTTTT Thu 25-Apr-13 20:00:23

Xx thanks just to say i am thinking of you.

minkulus Thu 25-Apr-13 18:33:24

Hi everyone! Just checking in to let you know we are still plodding on.
Ottilie, I feel for you. Your pain and loss is no less legitimate or 'deserving'. You lost someone who was and had been an enormous part of your life. I hope you are feeling ok.
I am spending the last few days before the funeral just making sure I have done everything I can to make it a special day.
My beautiful DCs are doing ok. DD is up and down, as to be expected. She is amazing! DS is accepting things as far as I can tell. He likes to talk about daddy which is amazingly hard at times.
Thank you to everyone who has messages me, I will reply soon!

Yorkiegirl Wed 24-Apr-13 10:15:52

Hi minkulus how are you today? I have messaged you. My DH died abroad in 2006 when my DDs were 2 and 4.

OttilieKnackered Tue 23-Apr-13 22:04:00

I recently went through something sort of similar, though not the same. I don't want to try and compare the loss as there were no children and he was actually my ex, though only by a matter of weeks. We were still financially 'linked' and so I've had to do a lot of the stressful sorting out, even though I was not his next of kin.

Unless you have particularly awful inlaws or friends, the funeral WILL be beautiful. When all the people that loved a person gather together, it almost doesn't matter what else is around.

The thing that keeps catching me out is when I read or see something I know he would have had any opinion on. I keep going to text him. At first it made me cry, but now it's starting to make me smile, although I still sometimes get a little shock when I remember.

Yours is a different, and much tougher, situation, but in the first few days I thought I'd never be able to do anything again.

I hope you don't think I'm underplaying your loss, but I just thought it might help to hear from someone who has (so far) managed to hold it together.

Please take care.

ProphetOfDoom Sat 20-Apr-13 23:51:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fluffypillow Sat 20-Apr-13 23:24:36

What a terrible time for you sad

Thinking of you and your DC's. Lots of hugs coming your way xxx

TeaMakesItAllPossible Fri 19-Apr-13 20:25:34

Just popping on by to let you know I'm still thinking of you and your DC

BriansBrain Fri 19-Apr-13 16:55:13

How are you x

IcanandIwill Fri 19-Apr-13 04:33:01

I've been away but been thinking of you. Take comfort in those moments of calm, they are very precious xxx

BIWI Thu 18-Apr-13 08:57:53

Cuddles, DVDs and toast sound like a fab idea! Thinking of you xx

RatherBeOnThePiste Thu 18-Apr-13 08:39:09

Much love from me, am thinking of you all X

scottishmummy Thu 18-Apr-13 07:36:35

Gosh it's hard,take it minute by minute. Toast and cuddles is a great comfort

BriansBrain Wed 17-Apr-13 20:50:53

I'm pleased you have found time to update, I have been thinking about you.

Lovely post and glad to read all is calm x

TeaMakesItAllPossible Wed 17-Apr-13 20:36:28


minkulus Wed 17-Apr-13 19:21:38

Hi everyone. Just checking in. Had a really full on day again but am making progress with funeral arrangements etc so feel its tiredness that has been earned. My beautiful DCs are cuddling up while we watch a DVD and eat toast. My little world. X

theboutiquemummy Wed 17-Apr-13 17:26:25

Hi Mink how are you doing x

BriansBrain Tue 16-Apr-13 22:51:44

Hey Mink, how are you feeling?

member Mon 15-Apr-13 20:56:52

I've just seen this thread for the first time & whilst I have no practical advice, I just wanted to let you know that I've read & you're in my thoughts. flowers

ChippingInLovesSpring Mon 15-Apr-13 20:35:32

I'm glad it went OK with DH's family. Sending you a bit more love & strength to keep putting one foot in front of the other x

Blondeshavemorefun Mon 15-Apr-13 20:29:58

glad went as well as it can under the circumstances with your inlaws

thinking of you x

Homebird8 Mon 15-Apr-13 20:28:48

There are times when words desert me. So, handhold. flowers

xigris Mon 15-Apr-13 10:13:29

How are you today, Mink? so glad that it went well with your in laws. X

Nat38 Mon 15-Apr-13 09:37:43

So glad that every thing went well yesterday for you.
It is sad that it takes something like this to make people get on a bit better for whatever reasons.

minkulus Mon 15-Apr-13 09:22:39

Yesterday went well. We are meeting again today to sort out some more bits and pieces. So sad that after some years of not getting on so well, we are now all pulling in the same direction. The irony and tragedy of lots of families I guess.

BriansBrain Sun 14-Apr-13 21:16:30

I also hope you got everything you needed out of today and its nice to see some MNers near to you offering support.

We are all here when you need us even if its only viral x

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