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when is it right to try again??

(4 Posts)
beanieboy250712 Fri 12-Oct-12 19:09:44

I received my post mortem results today. My husband and I resigned ourselves we wouldn't get an answer to why our perfect little bit was stillborn and we would have to live with the fact it was ' one if those awful things'.

After speaking with the consultant, its turns out there was a reason and it was due to an infection in my placenta.

Part of me is glad we got a reason and a cause. The Dr tried her best to reassure us going forward for future pregnancies but when is the right time to consider another pregnancy???

JustFabulous Fri 12-Oct-12 19:13:30

I am so sorry you lost your little boy.

The right time to consider trying for another baby is when you want too. That could be straight away or in 15 years time. Only you know and only you matter. If anyone else makes a comment just ignore them.

I lost a baby and conceived the following month. Nowhere near the same as your situation as mine was a miscarriage but we didn't want to wait and only did for the next period to make dating easier.

plumviolet Fri 12-Oct-12 19:30:03

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious little baby.

You know officially that there is no reason why you can't try again. So you just have to go with whatever feels right for you in your heart. For me, it was straight away. I felt empty and wanted a baby in my arms so desperately that i wanted to get pregnant and go into a coma for nine months to get through it again. Looking back now i realise that was not rational and I tried to soon. I was desperate to hold her in my arms but i was never going to replace her and she was at the end of the day what I wanted. It took me a year to concieve again (after getting pregnant the first time round) and i think that was because i was emotionally not ready.

Take your time to grieve. You are hurting. Your body is recovering.

woollyjo Fri 12-Oct-12 19:40:48

Hi Beanie,

so sorry to see that you have had to go through this. Our DD2 was stilborn at full-term. We decided we wouldn't do anything to prevent another pg and I caught on my second cycle so there are 11 months between dd2 and dd3.

Consider what is right for you and your dp, I initially felt quite guilty for being pg again and was worried what people would say. It was however a tough pg for us both despite being problem free and when dd3 was born in good health we were both in floods of tears from the relief. It wasn't until after DD3 had been born I realised how weighed down with worry we both had been.

I hope this helps, for the next few months be kind to yourselves.

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