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Why and why here?

(29 Posts)
Welshmum Tue 16-Dec-03 08:52:13

I suppose if you're going to have a miscarriage at 12 weeks it's crap whever you are. But I ask you, on the other side of the world while sharing a house with your parents in law.......don't know what else to say really. I feel absolutely dreadful and I miss all my friends and family so much it hurts. I feel like I have to keep concentrating hard on how lovely DH and DD are or my heart will break.

motherinferior Tue 16-Dec-03 08:55:09

Oh, darling. I am *so* sorry. Where are you? A cyberhug from someone you don't know won't be nearly enough, but it's all I can do. MIxxxxxx

lazyeye Tue 16-Dec-03 08:56:23

Oh Welshmum I'm so sorry. 12 weeks seems so late -just getting over the crap stage. How long are you staying wherever you are? Are you coming back?
I've had 2 m/cs(but much earlier than you) and I defo needed some friends must be awful in someone elses house.

I know what you mean about concentrating on your daughter and hubbie but somehow it doesn't ease the pain. I have no advice except take it easy and be very kind to yourself. Keep your daughter close & believe you will have another......lots of love

M2T Tue 16-Dec-03 09:07:40

Welshmum -

Hope you find the support you need. You have a beautiful daughter to cherish.

Do you know what could have caused it? Probably not top of your priorities at the moment.

Take care.

Bron Tue 16-Dec-03 09:26:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bunny2 Tue 16-Dec-03 09:42:10

How sad, you poor thing. Be kind to yourself and cry as much as you need to. Somedays I thought I would never stop crying, it is such a heartbreaking thing to go through. Lots of hugs over to you xxx

WSM Tue 16-Dec-03 10:01:29

How awful. Much sympathy and love winging its way over to you. Perhaps a phone call to a really good friend will help, someone you can really 'pour out' to ? I know that when we lost Hollie (at 26 wks) I couldn't bear speaking to anyone face to face but I found the phone helped. It allowed me to keep part of my protective barrier up but also enabled me to vent my grief.


Twinkie Tue 16-Dec-03 10:08:16

Message withdrawn

ThomCat Tue 16-Dec-03 10:11:06

Oh God, how terribly sad you poor poor little thing.
Motherinferior says it for me really - a cyberhug is all I have to offer.
Do keep concentrating on your DH and DD and Mumsnet is ALWAYS here, 24/7.
Lots of love to you - Thomcat xx

Azure Tue 16-Dec-03 11:32:28

Welshmum, I'm so sorry to hear your news. I had a m/c at 11.5 weeks in October - looking back I suspect that the baby died at 8 weeks, which is within the usual early miscarriage timeframe. It must be very difficult being in someone else's house so far from home. I'm sure your friends and family wish they were close by too and would prefer you to call them, if only to cry. Take care.

morocco Tue 16-Dec-03 11:42:02

hugs welshmum

cerys Tue 16-Dec-03 12:23:41

Oh Welshmum, I'm so sorry. Hope you find the strength and support to get through this horrible time.
Sending you lots of special Welsh hugs


MincePie Tue 16-Dec-03 13:22:37

I'm so sorry to hear your news Welshmum, take care

pie xxx

Blu Tue 16-Dec-03 13:43:54

So sad. I hope you can find the right place to just curl up and snuggle. Your poor DH, too. You must all fel very bleak and lonely. Sending a hug

quackers Tue 16-Dec-03 14:12:24

I'm so sorry to hear this Welshmum.

Hope you can get back soon and be in your own environment. Do keep posting, there'll be lots of poeple here to give kind words and support. {{{{{{{{}}}}}}}

CountessDracula Tue 16-Dec-03 14:13:56

Welshmum, big hugs to you xxxx

samACon Tue 16-Dec-03 14:56:01

Nothing I can say that hasn't been said already. Big Hugs to you all.

wilbur Tue 16-Dec-03 14:58:31

So sorry to hear about this Welshmum, my thoughts are with you.

Freddiecat Tue 16-Dec-03 15:00:55

really sorry about your news.

NorfolkTurkey Tue 16-Dec-03 17:35:57

Oh God, I am so very sorry . Again there is nothing I can say that hasn't already been said. Just remember it is not your fault and I promise you that in time, the pain will ease. Lots of love xxx

sibble Tue 16-Dec-03 17:36:07

welshmum, I am so sorry to hear your news. I am not much help in Auckland but if you want to pick up the phone and let rip to somebody you have only chatted to in cyber space just ask tech for my details. I had a m/c here at 8 weeks earlier this year (we had only moved here 6 months before) and the hardest part was being so far away from family and friends and people you could just chat to without having to think.
my heart goes out to you.

bobthebaby Tue 16-Dec-03 19:25:56

Welshmum, that's terrible news. How terribly unfair. How long are you in NZ for?

Welshmum Tue 16-Dec-03 19:26:53

Thanks for all your kind thoughts - it really is a comfort. I'm going for a scan this morning - so ironic that this was supposed to be a holiday. It's like a black comedy - a very black comedy.

Ghosty Tue 16-Dec-03 19:44:49

Welshmum .... so sorry to hear this
If you want to talk (I had an m/c at 12 weeks last year) just get in touch with me through contact a talker and I can ring you ... I am in Auckland but at least it is closer than the UK!
Hugs {{{}}}

hmb Tue 16-Dec-03 19:50:38

Poor love, have a cwch. The same thing happened to me at 12 weeks. Get all the help that you can. Poor thing.

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