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A Reading/Poem for Funeral of Stillborn baby girl

(46 Posts)
WestCountryLass Mon 16-Jan-06 21:15:57

Do not stand at my grave and weep is such a beautiful and comforting poem.

I am so sorry for the loss of India

mrsdarcy Fri 13-Jan-06 22:28:10

I'm so sorry for India's parents. A terrible time for them.

ELEGY FOR A STILL-BORN CHILD

Your mother walks light as an empty creel
Unlearning the intimate nudge and pull

Your trussed-up weight of seed-flesh and
bone-curd
Had insisted on. That evicted world

Contracts round its history, its scar.
Doomsday struck when your collapsed
sphere

Extinguished itself in our atmosphere,
Your mother heavy with the lightness in her.

For six months you stayed cartographer
Charting my friend from husband towards
father.

He guessed a globe behind your steady
mound.
Then the pole fell, shooting star, into the
ground.

On lonely journeys I think of it all,
Birth of death, exhumation for burial;

A wreath of small clothes, a memorial
pram
And parents reaching for a phantom limb.

I drive by remote control on this bare road
Under a drizzling sky, a circling rock.

Past mountain fields full to the brim with
cloud.
White waves riding home on a wintry lough.

-- Seamus Heaney

Thirtysix Thu 12-Jan-06 16:42:23

Thye are all so beautiful-I plan to print off this thread so India's Mum and Dad can see how kind you have all been.x

zephyrcat Thu 12-Jan-06 16:30:35

This is very short but still a lovely sentiment...

'An Angel wrote in the book of life,
My baby's date of birth,
Then whispered as she closed the book,
"Too beautiful for Earth". '

amyjade Thu 12-Jan-06 16:28:18

Sorry ment compassionate.
Hope you find something. xx

From another bereaved mummy, my thoughts are with India's parents at this difficult time.

amyjade Thu 12-Jan-06 16:25:47

Have a look on Compassioate friends website they have hundreds of poems.

amyjade Thu 12-Jan-06 16:24:31

A poem for you.


Little Snowdrop

The world may never notice
If a Snowdrop doesn't bloom,
Or even pause to wonder
If the petals fall too soon.
But every life that ever forms,
Or ever comes to be,
Touches the world in some small way
For all eternity.


The little one we long for
Was swiftly here and gone.
But the love that was then planted
Is a light that still shines on.
And though our arms are empty,
Our hearts know what to do.
Every beating of our hearts
Says that we love you.

- Author Unknown -

Thirtysix Thu 12-Jan-06 16:18:55

Thank you all so much for these....I really don't know how I am going to be able to read any of them without breaking down but I know I must.

Thank you again

Marina Thu 12-Jan-06 13:34:24

She had a holiday booked just after he died and was all for cancelling it to stay with us. We insisted she went and they made a lovely low-tide beach sculpture of his name, then photographed it, and the sunset, for his memory box.
Sisters and SILs - we are lucky to have them. And friends too thirtysix.

bundle Thu 12-Jan-06 13:31:43

of course, I should have known she would have read it. my sil read a passage from Bernard Mcclaverty's Grace Notes about the joy of having a child (at our wedding)- and blubbed - so I can only begin to imagine how it felt for your sister, reading those tender words about Tom.

Marina Thu 12-Jan-06 13:28:42

My sister read it in her best professional voice for us, but she did wobble very badly bundy
I had a quiet snuffle for India and her parents when typing it out again tbh

bundle Thu 12-Jan-06 13:26:06

marina, how on earth do you read something like that without a wobbly voice? (who read it for you?)

Marina Thu 12-Jan-06 13:22:39

We had this for our stillborn son's funeral, Thirtysix:

For a Child Born Dead by Elizabeth Jennings

What ceremony can we fit
You into now? If you had come
Out of a warm and noisy room
To this, there'd be an opposite
For us to know you by. We could
Imagine you in lively mood

And then look at the other side,
The mood drawn out of you, the breath
Defeated by the power of death.
But we have never seen you stride
Ambitiously the world we know.
You could not come and yet you go.

But there is nothing now to mar
Your clear refusal of our world.
Not in our memories can we mould
You or distort your character.
Then all our consolation is
That grief can be as pure as this.

The last verse in particular really summed up the desolate way we were feeling.

I am so sorry that India died. Your best friend is lucky to have you to share the grief and the joy of being a mother.
I hope the hospital has put her in touch with SANDS - they can also suggests poems and readings.

We also had Matthew 19:13 onwards, the reading where Jesus welcomes all children.

melrose Thu 12-Jan-06 13:20:30

From the Caron Keating Foundation website, think it was read at Caron's funeral. I think it is beautiful, always makes me cry

Sometimes

Sometimes, when the sun goes down, It seems it will never rise again… but it will!

Sometimes, when you feel alone, It seems your heart will break in two… but it won’t.

And sometimes, it seems it’s hardly worthwhile carrying on…
But it is.

For sometimes, when the sun goes down,
It seems it will never rise again,
But it does

Frank Brown

acnebride Thu 12-Jan-06 13:16:18

i copied that off another site and I think it is short measure (singular) in the last line. i wd check in a book, obviously.

acnebride Thu 12-Jan-06 13:15:13

This one is apparently used at a lot of funerals, I read it first in Family by Susan Hill and cry every time, I think it is beautiful.

The Noble Nature by Ben Jonson

The Noble Nature

It is not growing like a tree
In bulk, doth make Man better be;
Or standing long as oak, three hundred year,
To fall at last, dry, bald, and sere:

A lily of a day
Is fairer far in May,
Although it fall and die that night—
It was the plant and flower of Light.
In small proportions we just beauties see;
And in short measures life may perfect be.

bundle Thu 12-Jan-06 13:12:17

if she hasn't got one already, do get her a nice pretty box which she can put some keepsakes in to remember her by.

frogs Thu 12-Jan-06 13:11:32

Or this one, by Christina Rossetti:


Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more, day by day,
You tell me of our future that you plann'd:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.

Roobie Thu 12-Jan-06 13:10:34

Sorry to hear about your friend. My friends had Remember by Christina Rossetti at the funeral of their stillborn son last year.


Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you plann'd:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.

Christina Rossetti

shrub Thu 12-Jan-06 13:05:49

so so sorry for your best friend.
do not stand at my grave and weep is a beautiful poem and has brought me comfort
xxx

Thirtysix Thu 12-Jan-06 12:58:50

My best friend gave birth to a stillborn little girl (India) on Tuesday.I have spent time over the last two days with her,her partner and the baby in the delivery suite.I managed to find a very small babygrow so when they leave her later today she will be "warm".

I needn't say how devastating this is for all of them but they have asked me to read at her funeral.I just wondered if any of you wonderful people know of any lovely poems/readings I may be able to use?

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