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40th birthday

(3 Posts)
plymouthmaid Thu 30-Jun-11 19:55:26

I've posted on here before about my lovely mum who died in April. In January she rang to tell me that she and my Dad had booked us into a lovely hotel for my 40th birthday(after my mum died Dad told me that my brothers,sil and my nieces and nephews were also coming as a surprise). I had just been shopping with some money Mum had given me and had bought an evening dress and I said to my mum that I would be able to wear it that weekend. Well, the weekend of my birthday is finally here and I cant stop crying. I know that wherever we go from now on there will always be an "empty chair" but there really be one this weekend (Dad obviously had to change the reservation) we were all going to be their as a family she even knew what I was going to wear. The weekend obviously means a lot as it was the last thing my mum planned for me and my fab family are travelling all from around the country to celebrate with me .
I am really worried that I am going to totally spoil the weekend for everybody and I dont want to be sad as my mum would have loved all of us being together and I know who important this weekend is for my dad. As a family we totally support eachother and I know they understand how I am feeling but I just feel so lost. Sorry for such a rambling post!

ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrolls Thu 30-Jun-11 20:02:54

plymouth, it really isn't that suprising that you are feeling this way. Wow, what an emotional time for you all. I would think many of your family members are also worried that they are going to ruin your weekend. Enjoy your family, enjoy the memories and take the opportunity to make some more as a family. Happy Birthday smile

Oblomov Thu 30-Jun-11 21:27:06

Plymouth. Ahhh baba. I did all my clubbing in plymy. Lived in Manadon, then near Tavi for years.
Don't feel bad. all you feelings are totally rationale and logical and eveything else. Are you close to any of your sisters / brothers ? Tell them. I'm sure they'll understand.
BUT..... then you have to go, and seriously enjoy. and I don't mean just put on a brave face,i mean really enjoy it for what it is. no one will mind if you shed a tear. or if you all have a moment to remember how lovely , fanatstic and loving your mum was. But seriously it has to stop there. You can't let misery ruin the whole evening.
She woulldn't have wanted that. And you know that. Have a glass of wine. and talk and dance. And talk about all the best bits, the time she did... and the time she .. and you will all laugh and talk about her the way she would want to be talked about.
And you can do thta. Enjoy. And show her the honour she deserves.

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