An aquaintance of mine (and a pub friend of DH) committed suicide, lovely boy, only 18, so many friends, a loving family, everything going for him. And he killed himself. aI knew him in the sense that I would chat to him on the rare times I go to the pub or Id see him in the village, where he worked but I wouldnt know him like his good friends, where he lives or his family.
But since I heard the news, I cant stop crying, Im crying typing this, I crying when I am in the shop where he worked. I cant get my head around the idea that he did this. I know he must have been in a dark place to do it but he didnt seem to be, there were no signs to anyone. I cant stop picturing someone finding him or imagining the grief of his family and all his friends and when I think of it I weep but I cant stop thiking of it.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. It sounds like a truly sad situation and an awful loss of such a young life. The death of a young person always seems in some way sadder than that of someone older.
Please don't try to stop the tears. If they need to come, let them. Everyone deals with grief in different ways and this is obviously your way of dealing with it. Cry them out. Let them flow. When you have cried enough, they will stop and you will feel better for it.
Im sort of in a a similar situation. My friend had her stillborn baby just last week. Like you, i cant stop crying, im constantly thinking of her and what she had to go through. My poor friend, everytime i see her i just want to hold her to comfort her but understandably she doesnt want to talk or even to see anyone. She will when shes ready
A lady I know died suddenly and she leaves a 3 month baby behind.
Its awful truly awful.
Sometimes I think I have got a hold on it. Then something happens and I just cant stop crying.
We are selling the house at the moment and a couple of days ago a young family came around with their 3 month old daughter. She was beautiful and then I just started to fill up. They must have thought I was completely mad !
Are you going to the funeral ? I dont know if that helps ... give you some kind of closure ?