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could my dd be seeing my dad (deceased)- i have posted in philiosphy to but not sure where it is most releavant

(10 Posts)
rdmommy Fri 14-Jan-11 11:23:57

I am not sure if i'm in the right place but wanted to ask a question as its really playing on my mind.

my dad died of alcoholism nearly 6 years ago. he was my idol and only 51 when he passed. he always talked about grandkids etc but i was only 23 when he passed so had only be married for a short time so no grandkids at that point.

he is buried close by and have always visited him with my children, when we brought our dd1 home from hospital before went home we took her to him and we often go to the grave and let off balloons for him.

my dd1 is 2y11 months and was a late speaker so when she has come out with the following it has stumped me.

i have always told her grandad ** lives on a star and she often says hello to him when the stars are out.

the other night i was feeding dd2 and she hid behind me and said no grandad ** thats is not how you play peek a boo, this way silly.... now i have never referred to 'peek a boo' as that it has always been hide and seek or boo so it is unusual for her to use that term.

then last night i was on the landing putting some towels away and she was playing in her room and she was chatting away to her toys i thought but then i heard her say 'grandad ** no sad or cry, mommy loves you and me and dd2. shall we go back to the burn..' now the 'burn' was somewhere my dad played when he was little, its 300 miles away where he used to live and my dd1 has never been there nor have i talked about it to her.

I know this is probably silly but do you think she sees him? she says she does but whether thats just her saying so because i asked i'm not sure.


rockinhippy Fri 14-Jan-11 11:43:30

Not silly at all, definitely not from my own experience with my DD,

& also having has her then Nursery teacher start asking me about things DD talked with her about her past life shock & her old fashioned views on things "Ladies don't drive Cars, Ladies Don't drink, smoke etc etc) first I thought it was a bit of a trick question, as by then I firmly believed DD WAS seeing & remembering things she couldn't be, but not something you own up to with virtual strangers confused ...turned out it was a big interest of the Nursery Teacher, & she told me that the number of kids she'd had through her care that talked of past lives & seeing dead relatives etc, especially with early talkers as my DD was would astound a lot of people.....DD used to refer to me & DH as her "other Mummy & Daddy" up until about 2 & described remembering last time she died in detailshock

It does seem they grow out of a lot of it though, my DD is still quite psycic, still sees things, though MUCH less so & has no past life memory any more,

She also once piped up about DHs Mum......Great is Nana X coming, other Granda will come to then, I like him a lot, he always comes when Nana X comes to stay.........DHs Dad had also died LONG before she was born & she went on to describe him to a tee.....something even I couldn't of done, as I'd only seen photos of him as a young no, not silly, just not believed by all, but thats fine ,,,we know better wink

missmehalia Fri 14-Jan-11 11:53:33

I think children are far more open to this stuff than we may realise, but they learn not to talk about it as they grow older (and I think as they are more and more socialised they can 'see' and be open to less).

Not surprising at all. There are things she's saying that she couldn't possibly have known about. I used to teach young children, and heard several stories similar to this. Has been my main supporting evidence, in fact, for my belief that there is 'something' for us beyond death. In the same way I think there is something powerful about homeopathic medicine (when you get it right). Tiny babies and animals often respond startlingly well to it, and they have no way of knowing about the placebo effect.

Lovely to hear it's fun for her! smile

dejavuaswell Fri 14-Jan-11 14:26:42

Re homeopathic medicine - I am not aware of any peer reviewed study that shows babies responding "startling well to it". If you know of any such paper please share!

Ghosts on the other hand are a whole different issue! [smile}

MrsOsha Fri 14-Jan-11 18:56:59

Hello - I believe it's quite possible. I lost my mum a year ago, right before Christmas and my dad followed her only 7 weeks later (hard year). I hear my mum's voice sometimes, and I dream of them frequently. They each died suddenly - my mother within 3 months of a cancer diagnosis and my dad from a combination of therapy to prevent a recurrance of prostate cancer (ironic?)and the stress of losing my mother. They came to me in a dream right after his passing - they were together in an airport waiting room and they were telling me, in their typical way, what it was like where they were now. They were normal, griping about too much red tape (in heaven, I guess? LOL). It was so normal. But I believe little ones are much more open than the rest of us "grown ups". They don't have any notion that they shouldn't be seeing what they're seeing. What a lovely gift your dad is giving you. He's there for you...anyway...sorry to be long winded. But I was struck by your post. I think it is very possible, and we're not all "nutters".

ChippingIn Fri 14-Jan-11 19:02:55

Yes, I believe it's quite possible. It's also possible that she's heard a story about Peek A Boo and Grandad is a convenient imaginary friend and that someone else has mentioned the 'burn' to her...? I hope for her she is seeing her Grandad

rdmommy Fri 14-Jan-11 19:35:34

thanks ladies, really interesting to know it is common(ish). I know i have never spoken to her about the 'burn' my fathers family live 300 miles away and i have not seen them since last year. I know i would never used the terminology instead i would have called it a little park or woods so not to confuse her.

I didn't mention it today but in the car i was chatting to her and i asked her where grandad was and she said on his star at the minute but the she said he would be in her room later.. iasked what he was wearing as she knows his hair colour from the picture and she said 'all white'.

Part of me relishes that she may be seeing him but then again the fact that she even thins of him makes me feel that he is a live in her.

MrsOsha Fri 14-Jan-11 21:17:28

He's alive in all of you - you love him and remember him and speak of him...that is it's own immortality

nickschick Fri 14-Jan-11 21:21:38

My ds3 used to speak of the time he stayed with his nanna ....he knew all about her,her clothes her foods the way she wore more than 1 pair of glasses at a time ......not unusual i suppose but his nanna died 5 years before he was born shock he used to tell us in great detail about her and what they did ....and theres no doubt it was her, Dh used to get great comfort from it then one day he simply said 'im not supposed to talk about it' and then the memories petered off......hes now 10 and if we mention it he genuinely doesnt 'know' the things he told us about.....its too weird not to be true.

Tillyscoutsmum Fri 14-Jan-11 21:28:31

I vividly remember my Nanna coming to visit me when I was young (she died when I was 3). She used to sit on my bed and just chat and play with me. I was never scared and it was completely "normal" to me but it really freaked my mum out. She brought a Priest into the house to bless it (we weren't even Catholic shock).

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