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My son needs pottery training, sleep training and bloody food 'training' WWYD first

(86 Posts)
TheSecondComing Sat 09-Mar-13 22:01:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

gaelicsheep Sat 09-Mar-13 22:02:54

I think you could leave pottery training for now wink

TheSecondComing Sat 09-Mar-13 22:05:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

gaelicsheep Sat 09-Mar-13 22:07:36

grin I will answer properly in a mo, I have the same problem here.

Aworryingtrend Sat 09-Mar-13 22:09:40

I think start with whatever bothers you the most. it sounds like hes ready to be out of nappies though. Can't you get a step so he can reach the toilet? its not his fault hes not tall enough. can he watch your dh on the toilet so he sees even daddies sit down for number 2s.

gaelicsheep Sat 09-Mar-13 22:10:38

OK, well actually I've no advice but I can moan alongside you. My DD starts nursery in September and is nowhere close to potty training. We tried again today and there is no interest whatsoever. She just cries if you put her on the potty or the toddler seat. I'm at my wits end and praying for some good weather this summer to crack it once and for all out in the garden.

DD also shares a room with her 6 year old brother and I frequently have to bring her to bed with us so she doesn't disturb him. She is miles better than she was, but it's still quite a problem sometimes.

Sounds like you're having a very hard time of it. I will watch this thread with interest for advice.

timidviper Sat 09-Mar-13 22:10:41

Too amused at pottery to think of a sensible answer! smile

Beamur Sat 09-Mar-13 22:12:03

I'd do sleep first as it would benefit you all.
Food is complicated, but my feeling about eating in general would be not to punish. I have 3 kids (2 are SC) and each have their own 'quirks' when it comes to food - for various reasons. Is your son fussy over texture/flavour or is it more of a control issue do you think?
Potty training - you get there in the end whatever you do. Could Daddy show him that poos need to be done sitting down - even if you're a boy?

ToTeachOrNotToTeach Sat 09-Mar-13 22:12:07

2.6 is still quite young to potty train around here. A lot started at 2.9ish when they're allowed to start pre-school and seeing the "big children" use the toilet was a big help and incentive for some. Quite a few trained once 3 from our group I think.

Our pre-school had a good rotation of snacks which also helped at least with variety at snack time, seeing others eat etc (so crackers and cheese and tomato one day, hummus and bread sticks the next, carrot sticks the next(.

Maybe take a step back from trying to "train" him at all for a month or so and come back to it all with a fresh plan?

Hassled Sat 09-Mar-13 22:12:46

I think you need to chill a bit about the food. The more it's a naughty-step sort of issue, the more it's an issue. He's getting protein, carbs and some fruit - he'll cope OK on that for now. Make it all a massive non-issue - you don't give a flying fuck if he eats that carrot or not - and he may sort himself out (he may not - I have a 14 year old fussy eater and nothing has ever sorted him out but that's why vitamin supplements were invented).

The potty training - leave it. The law is actually that when you're 3, you get a party and presents but you have to stop with daytime nappies. That's just what happens. Until then, he sits on the loo or he stays in his nappies - no either or (the poo fishing out sounds hideous).

The sleep - other than a complete refusal to engage (he asks to look out of the window, you just fail to reply) I dunno. But no pandering - no, 3am is never a reasonable time to ask for a snack.

ToTeachOrNotToTeach Sat 09-Mar-13 22:12:50

Ah yes sleep. Sleep is good. We have problems with sleep with your 14 month old, wakes the older one so have to take out of room. No idea.

TheSecondComing Sat 09-Mar-13 22:13:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

3littlefrogs Sat 09-Mar-13 22:13:36

I think a lot of problems can be caused by tiredness.

So - I think you would be best getting the sleep sorted, then the other things might be easier.

It is not unusual for a 2.5 yr old to not eat much, and not to be ready for toilet training. A child who is ill will always regress, so needs to be managed as if they are at least 6 months younger than they are.

You need to look at how many hours of sleep he is getting now, including naps, and whether you are establishing a good routine of calming and winding down before bed time, and encouraging a nap during the day. He needs about 12 hours sleep in every 24, and plenty of fresh air and exercise every day.

How well is his asthma controlled? Do you see an asthma nurse regularly? Some drugs used for asthma cause hyperstimulation and can make life very difficult. If this is the case, you need to see his consultant and see if different drugs would help.

If you can break things down into separate issues, then tackle one thing at a time, that would be the way to go.

Do you have any pets or smokers in the house?
Have you got rid of any potential allergens or aggravating materials that might make his asthma worse?

MegBusset Sat 09-Mar-13 22:14:00

OK one at a time and not including pottery wink

Sleep - I would sort this first. I am a meanie when it comes to sleep and would do controlled crying/rapid return with him (stick DD in a mattress in your bedroom for a few days til you have it cracked) but I'm sure some would accuse me of scarring DC for life by that!

Food - Meat, dry pasta and fruit is really not that awful for a 2yo, honestly it isn't. DS1 was existing basically on fish fingers and the occasional bit of cheese at that age. Just keep sticking food in front of him and he won't starve,

Potty training - forget about it for now. 2.6 is still very early, DS1 was well over 3 before he was ready. When they are ready then a couple of days of bribery should do the trick.

3littlefrogs Sat 09-Mar-13 22:14:29

X posted with everyone else (Slow typing).

TheSecondComing Sat 09-Mar-13 22:17:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MegBusset Sat 09-Mar-13 22:19:17

So stick a beaker of milk next to his bed. 2.6 old enough to help himself to a drink in the night without waking the rest of the household.

gaelicsheep Sat 09-Mar-13 22:21:11

I don't know if this is any help, but DD's settling and sleep has improved since we've started giving a snack immediately before bed. Just a round of bread and butter normally, but that normally ensures a much more settled night.

Beamur Sat 09-Mar-13 22:22:40

The tactic I used on demands for snacks after bedtime with my DD was to offer the same - always the same snack - one dry oatcake and a drink of water - really really boring, so only to be required when hungry (or to create a little bit of time with me whilst she ate it...) but that was only available between her bedtime and mine - any demands outside of that would be met with being told she now had to wait until breakfast time. Similarly, on the rare occasions she would come in and 'sleep' in with us, she mostly just wriggled and kept me awake so would be told unless she lay still and went to sleep she would have to go back to her own bed.
I think you do need to be a bit tougher about these nighttime shenanigans. Maybe pick a school holiday to try and sort it out, so if your older child is disturbed she hasn't got to go to school the next day.
My DD was still in nappies at that age, whilst he sounds like he is doing well (overall) he is still very young.
This is also the perfect age for fussy eating!

Beamur Sat 09-Mar-13 22:24:29

Like gaelicsheep my DD always has a little snack before bedtime too - usually some milk and a biscuit or bread and butter.

TheSecondComing Sat 09-Mar-13 22:28:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

beatofthedrum Sat 09-Mar-13 22:36:12

Sorry to laugh, but the image of him standing all hopeful for a wee and...splat. It does sound a bit funny!

I hate it when it all seems to be going wrong at once - I remember thinking that about dd when she was about the same age. She's great at everything now! That's what I keep telling myself when ds behaves bizarrely.

I agree sleep is prob the key thing, though have no solutions. I am a softie. My ds is just a bit younger than yours and sleeps well, but he's a rubbish eater and I haven't started pottery training him yet. All dealable with as sleep makes the difference I do agree so hopefully someone will provide an idea you can try?

beatofthedrum Sat 09-Mar-13 22:38:39

Sorry, cross-posting about him being ill and then my post starting about laughing about OP! I sound a meanie!

Beamur Sat 09-Mar-13 22:40:05

Poor little lad - if his medication is affecting his sleep, it seems harsh to be as firm with him as you would be other kids.
Could you do anything to make his bed more 'special' so that he is keener to sleep in it - a new toy that he only gets to have at bedtime, or a duvet cover with a favourite character on it? Sheer bribery perhaps..? My DD was hard to potty train but the promise of a new scooter once she started doing poos in the potty helped a lot grin

BeaWheesht Sat 09-Mar-13 22:42:33

I don't know but really its crap isn't it.

Dd is 2, she isn't my PFB but I definitely feel like she's caught me on te hop and I've no idea what im doing. Am always firefighting iykwim?

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