Sounds like she may be worried/scared of using the toilets at school - I've known lots of children even at junior school who don't go all day because they don't like the toilets - but they can manage to hold it in - a 3 year old can't. Could you try visiting the school toilets with her, maybe even use them yourself?
i have visited the toilets with her and it does seem she dont like them that much coz she looked down at the toilet and coz it was dirty she ran out of it into another one. i have told the teachers but they say they ask her repeatedly does she need a wee and she always say no, but wen they do take her she dont go but will go off playing and within 5 mins she has soaked herself! any more ideas?
You know what? I would ignore it and ask the teachers to as well. She will soon work it out. She's only 3! I would take issue with the fact that the teachers are 'constantly' asking if she needs a wee - no wonder she's getting a complex about it!
i live in wales and down here they start children at the age of 3 in the nursery part of the school. thanks for everyone's advice its really helpful! just got to think wot is the right thing to do for my daughter.