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Carrying a 2yo - at what point do I stop doing it?

(18 Posts)
Bouj Fri 10-Jun-05 04:53:41

Ds constantly wants to be carried if we go anywhere, and a fair amount at home too. Obviously at 2.2 he is no longer a baby (and bloody heavy) but at what point do I start to 'wean' him off it so to speak? Is it a phase (oh god I hope so) or do I have to get tough? Anyone else still carry their toddlers lots?

suzywong Fri 10-Jun-05 05:16:58

Start refusing and just make sure you have something else and pretty obvious in your hands when he asks next and then he'll moan and then forget about it. Don't carry him if you don't want to and it's not absolutely necessary.

Bouj Fri 10-Jun-05 06:11:19

Thanks suzy - knew I could rely on you to be online and on my side of the world! Good idea about having something in my hands, will try that. DH makes it harder though, because if he is around he will pick ds up the minute he asks - which is usually after I have said no!

ladymuck Fri 10-Jun-05 08:06:31

Ds1 got weaned off being carried abruptly as I was expecting ds2 when he just turned 2, and as i had a c/s it was a no-no for a month. Managed to ditch the buggy at the same time btw though did use a buggy board for most of the next year.

Ds2 - I don't carry at home (and we have a decent ground area). He will try and get carried up from the bottom of the garden (150 feet, inclining down), but I usually turn it into a chasing game up tot he house. Inside the house, if it is clear that he wants a cuddle I take him to a sofa and gove him a cuddle there. (Ds2 turned 2 last month). HTH

stitch Fri 10-Jun-05 08:29:02

you stop when your back hurts. with me, that was long before 2..

colditz Fri 10-Jun-05 08:36:37

LOL, with ds is was as soon as he could walk. I don't carry. His choice is pushchair or walk.

He knows if I pick him up when we are on our way somewhere, he is going in his pushcair.

bobbybob Fri 10-Jun-05 08:47:02

I have a hip seat and pick up ds when he asks (and sometimes if I am late for something). If he's in the pram it's a choice of pram or walk though. He's 27months. I'm happy to carry him as with the hip seat it is great exercise and it's like a portable cuddle.

Fran1 Fri 10-Jun-05 08:47:16

When we are out walking, dd will often get tired and ask for a carry, so i carry her for a couple of mins and then say mummy's arms are tired and she'll have to go in the buggy.
She doesn't ask around the house though.

I don't think its a normal phase, just something your ds is used to, i'd start explaining to him that as he is so big and strong now, your arms can't carry him.

Definitely ask your dh not to carry him so much, otherwise you'll get nowhere!

morningpaper Fri 10-Jun-05 08:53:55

Make sure his shoes are super-comfy as well. Sometimes this can be why they don't want to walk. Maybe buy him some that light up when he walks to encourage him.

Bouj Fri 10-Jun-05 09:02:13

Thanks for the tips - will definitely put all of these into practice. we are going to start trying for number 2 soon, so would definitley like to have it done by then. Also because of the 'baby'thing the carrying conjures up for him.

morningpaper Fri 10-Jun-05 09:49:59

Here's another idea that works with my 2.5 year-old - get him a pull-along toy that he likes and take that for 'walks' (my daughter has a dreadfully noisy dog thing and a pram). It's a distraction and it might encourage a bit more independent walking.

Mandymoo Fri 10-Jun-05 19:52:02

So glad someone has raised this topic - my dd is 2.5 and is ok walking as long as its just me and her. As soon as other people are about she wants to be carried. I've fallen into a bad habit and i go along with it (anything for a quiet life) but obviously she is getting bigger and i cant do this for much longer. The pull along toy sounds like a good idea - might try that.

No advice unfortunately as i'm having the same problem but thank you for raising this issue

MANDY XX

bobbybob Sat 11-Jun-05 21:03:39

Does she want to be carried because from that vantage point she can join in or watch the conversation?

mummylonglegs Sat 11-Jun-05 21:18:46

Message deleted

Bouj Fri 17-Jun-05 02:59:35

Oooh, mp, is it a black and white yappy plastic one that barks 'bingo'!? Ds has this, got it for his first birthday, much to my horror, it drives me mad..

tigermoth Fri 17-Jun-05 07:58:22

must admit I carried my sons for ages - definitly till they were approaching 4 years old and on occasion, later. When they got too big I gave them piggy backs. I didn't say 'yes' automatically and sometimes the carry was just for a few minutes, but tbh I liked carrying them. I found it a good, quick way of calming them down if they were getting overexcited. It was also a matter of choosing my battles. I found it easier to carry them then start a big argument. I knew they would naturally grow out of wanting to be carried and I was happy to wait.

This is just my approach - not saying it is a good one My back is quite strong I think, and I was not pregnant at the time, so it was not a huge problem for me.

mandyc66 Fri 17-Jun-05 16:53:20

I feel sorry for you. None of mine have never wanted to be carried. its alway me walk!!!!
I think stop it at home and try stop it out..make some fun out of walking! Go somewhere safe and have a walking race etc. Get some one else to go for a walk and ask him to look after this other person by holding their hand very tightly!!!
Good luck!!!!

lmccrean Fri 17-Jun-05 17:11:05

I second the hipseat, although I have now swapped it for an ergo back carrier. The hipseat is very handy for a quick trip to the shops, or other short period of times - but did find it tough going for longer times. Although it has a high resale value on ebay, so its worth a try!

My dd is 2 1/2 and about 35 lbs. Although I have a bad back I can still carry her in the ergo for a few hours without a problem, and at her age she can jump in and out easily.

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