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Behaviour/development

one friend only

5 replies

ki28 · 05/10/2009 10:46

hi guys, hope everyone is ok? just a quick question.
my 4yr old is struggling at school with making friends(he has been at the school a year in the pre school, foundation stage 1(mornings only) and now is in foundation stage 2(full days))
he has just on friend and doesnt like to play with the others,he entertian the idea of having other friends but enjoys just havin on. The one friend has just changed from boy to another for the first time and he now is telling people that hte boy is just his friend and no one elses. has any one else dealt with this problem? He will play alongside others ie,at the sandbox or on the computer.

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sarah293 · 05/10/2009 10:48

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MavisEnderby · 05/10/2009 10:51

hI ki,my dd has sn so maybe a bit different but she is nearly 4 and "Plays alongside" other children quite a lot tho interacts more with her db.She has struck up a friendship with my friends sn child who is on the autistic spectrum and they kiss each other a lot.Other tahn that she mainly plays alongside other children

Maybe your dc is a bit shy,and a friend is a friend when all said and done

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Elk · 05/10/2009 10:53

Most children at this age like to have only one friend. They are still young for playing with others. As long as they will play happily near others I don't think it is a problem. Both dd1 and 2 have preferred friends.
Also, some people like groups and others don't. I am 35 and can get on with people but prefer 1 to 1 interactions as I find them easier other people I know are always surrounded by people which I would hate and I think I'm normal.

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longingforsleep · 05/10/2009 10:58

My DS, just 5, talks about the children in his class as being his friends, but doesn't have a special friend/best friend. It worries me sometimes, and I wonder if I should organise play dates at home. When I suggest this to my DS he doesn't seem hugely interested, so I'm inclined to leave it for now, as he seems happy enough.

Sorry, not much help, but wanted to give my (limited) experience. Anyone else an expert on the whole play date thing?

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ki28 · 05/10/2009 11:27

hi,thanks for your replies.
mavis,my son is just currently just in the process of being on the schools action plus.
There was worries bout him reguarding asd. But most of the worries are only very mild and think it may just be that he is over anxious and was very shy. hearing problems. the SALT seems to have no worries,so hoping he is just taking a little longer to adjust as we havent seen any of the problems arise out of school. we have done playdates with the children he has mentioned,been to play areas and cinema with them and no bother in teracting with them out of school. Maybe i should invite more then one round to play. but as everyone seems to think it ok to just have one friend,think il stop worrying and leave him to it. thanks