I'm new here and I don't have children, but am wondering if we dealt with this situation correctly.
Babysitting a friend's five year old son, we told him it was time for bed. He was perfectly fine about this, changing into pyjamas and brushing his teeth without fuss.
He then tried the classic 'My parents let me choose whether I go to bed or stay up all night'. We explained to him that he needed rest.
And then he seriously lashed out. He started punching my DP - a forty year old man - in the face and biting and kicking him. He hit DP over the head with a large metal loo roll holder and caused a cut to DP's head. DP tried to restrain him and honestly it was impossible - the strength in his little body was extraordinary. He got out of DP's grip (DP was being very calm, I thought he'd be shouty and impatient). The room is near the staircase and he very intentionally ran into me with such force that I went flying down the steps. DP lifted him up at this point (the child was unprepared as DP was behind him) and carried him into bed. There, the child started biting and punching him again, screaming various obscenities and breaking anything he could get his hands on.
DP switched off the light and left, but child began head-butting the wall. We didn't shout at him or - of course - manhandle him. But the anger and upset in my voice must have kicked in, because suddenly he was calm and apologetic. He lay down and we left him alone. TBH, my DP was left quite shaken - with another person's child it is hard to know what to do.
Anyway, an hour later, we were sitting watching a DVD when the child snuck in, and whacked me round the head with a box of lego and screamed 'bitch!'.
DP said nothing to him and carried the child back to bed.
The parents returned three hours after the agreed time. They asked 'any trouble?' and we tried to explain the events. They are exceptionally 'posh' and 'yummy mummy' - they responded 'ha! the naivety of the childless'. I am left horrified!
AIBU to expect a proper conversation about this? And how should we have reacted towards child at the time? He is so placid normally, the shock really threw us off kilter and we have no children. What a bizarre evening.
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Behaviour/development
Five year old aggression towards family friends (long sorry)
22 replies
Vivia · 05/10/2009 09:52
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