2.4yo saying "no" to everything

[sazzerbear]

DS is now 2.4 and recently been saying "no" to everything and being quite demanding, is this just terrible twos? We have always tried to instill manners into him. Seems to have started since nursery, not sure if just coincidence...TIA

[pointydoug]

This is a very common and lovable phase. Enjpoy it

[sazzerbear]

Thanks, I thought it was but wanted verification from the MN experts!!

[pointydoug]

It's a power thang

[sazzerbear]

Nursery seemed to think it was the end of the world, they asked if he'd been with the "wrong crowd"!

[JamesAndTheGiantBanana]

Mines doing it too, he was eating some pudding yesterday

ds "mmm"
me "is that nice?"
ds "no"

me "don't you like it?"
ds "no"

[pointydoug]

The wrong crowd? What, hanging out at the youth club?

[sazzerbear]

Well he is advanced for his age, they'll be giving him an asbo next

[Swaliswan]

Sadly, I understand what your nusery mean. My DD always says no to everything after spending the day with the CM's 2.9yo DD. It drives me insane every tuesday having to tell her that just because the CM's DD says no to everything and gets away with it, that is nnot how to behave and is silly

[Scottie22]

My dd is the same at the moment - 28 months and everything is 'nope' - definitely caught it from her older brother!!!

[pointydoug]

but nearly all kids go through a phase of enjoying saying no to everything, swali. There's no point trying to blame anyone.

[mazzystartled]

yep
they all do it
sometimes with embellishments
"no, not"
"no way jose"

nowt to do with being told "no" themselves its a well documented phase, most kids do it.

dd reckons its always better to say no then - perhaps reconsider. perhaps more of us should approachlife that way rather than the reverse.

[WaitingForVino]

Ah yes. Tis a phase. Survival tip: ask negative versions of the same questions to catch them out. Will amuse you which in turn will frustrate them which will take the fun out of it for them! Ex: you: "darling child, would you like a drink?" Dc: "no!" you:"would you not like a drink?" dc:"no!" ...tee hee hee (giggle)...

[meandjoe]

Oh god deffinitely just a phase (I hope) there was a thread on here not long ago about a 2 year old who was always 'negative' and saying no to everything. My ds is just the same at 2.2 drives me mad sometimes in the park
I say: do you want to go on the swings
ds: NO!
Me: OK then lets go for a walk over there then
ds On the swings on the swings on the swings (boo hoo)
me Oh so you do want to go on the swings then?
ds No no no!

Grrrrrr

[Swaliswan]

Pointydoug, I know that they all go through the 'no' phase but it is extremely clear that DD's behaviour is worse and, in particular, the 'no' to everything is far worse when she has been with the CM. I always get DD to snap out of it by being silly and playing games with it after we have the chat about not copying the CM's DD. The double negative idea always makes her laugh.

[mazzystartled]

why are you getting so heavy about it swali though? best to ignore imo, and possibly not helpful to point out the the CM's daughter is behaving what you consider badly, even htough it really seems to be the most minor of transgressions....

[Swaliswan]

Wow, you lot really are judging without knowing the full story.

[BabyBolat]

I kind of get what you are saying Swali - I think the point is, it may be just a phase that most LO's go through but might be worth (sazzer) making sure he is not picking up his behaviour from another source, as Swali's LO clearly is as there is a difference between the phase and copying bad behaviour for attention x

[BabyBolat]

Might be worth having a chat with the nursery (very informally) to see if there is a source there at all?

[cory]

swali, it is just possible that the CM's dd's behaviour is worse when she has been with your dd

I used to complain about how dreadfully ds behaved when together with his cousins who seemed unable to sit quietly at the table- and then I found out that the rest of the family was thinking the same about ds's effect on the other little boys; the truth was they egged each other on, though quite well behaved when apart

[sazzerbear]

Had a chat with the nursery and they admitted ds may have picked it up from one of the kids there! He was much better so far this week, fingers crossed!

[preggersplayspop]

I have this with my DS who is about the same age. We go off on a tangent with him, eg:

Would you like to go to the park? NO!
Well, would you like to read a book then? NO!
Do you like reading books? NO!
Is your name X? NO!
Is no your favourite word? , never caught him out!!!

(Followed by a tickle normally to make him laugh and to break the mood)