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NK4ba00f84X123cdf1f8e4 Fri 18-Sep-09 17:36:05

Hi, i'm new to mumsnet. Does anyone have any advice on dealing with tantrums in four year olds? Don't feel that i am getting anywhere at the moment. Have got cross which is what not to do i know and doesn't help.

kateGB Fri 18-Sep-09 21:00:18

Ignore and walk away!

Thankfully DD1 could never be arsed to throw a tant. DD2 (21 months) is an expert and has been since 7 months old ! I walk away and ignore, close the door (making sure she can't hurt herself on anything). Give her a few minutes to try and calm herself down then go back and give her a cuddle. She's still at an age though where the initial reason for the tant gets forgotten about but she's still upset but can't remember the reason.

A tant is done to attract attention, particularly as they get older, and to try and get what they want. It consumes a large amount of effort so if it doesn't work on either count then they will soon wonder why they should bother (hopefully ).

On a good day, once the tant has subsided then 'good mummy' would try and explain why the answer etc was no. On a bad day 'knackered mummy' would just keep the door shut until it goes quiet again!

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