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Is it normal to feel this exhausted by a 3.5 year old?

(38 Posts)
Feelingoptimistic Sat 05-Sep-09 20:54:49

Right, I feel like I am going a bit mad...

I have a nearly 3.5 year old DD. I love her to bits and she is a really very good most of the time. But she has always been a very active child, and one of those children that needs lots of attention. Lately I had been thinking what a joy she is to be with, and how much easier it was now compared to when she was younger.

But tonight, after spending the whole of Friday and Saturday with her, I feel so exhausted. She is still so full on, and what really gets to me now is when I tell her to do something and she does not listen - and I know she is doing it on purpose to test me. When she does that I can actually feel that stress and anger flooding my body, and I am worried I am going to have a heart attack or a storke or something, it affects me so much !

It is normal for 3 years old to be trying to "test you"?

justabouteatingchocolate Sat 05-Sep-09 21:00:30

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stickylittlefingers Sat 05-Sep-09 21:03:10

yep - I think that's where the expression "king 3" comes from. You have my sympathy! They know how to press all the right buttons... I don't have any real advice either, except to try and step back mentally (and physically too if necessary). And hope it doesn't last too long (I can't give you any light at the end of the tunnel either! Sorry! But lots of sympathy)

Feelingoptimistic Sat 05-Sep-09 21:06:19

Thanks ! I guess I just need to take a deep breath and not let it get to me so much !

I thought the worst was over when they hit about 3, but I suppose each age has its own challenges...
DD is a sleep now, and I feel better after a glass of wine, but maybe hitting the bottle is not the answer? grin

But seriously, does anyone else sometimes feel like they are going to have a heart attack or a nervous break down?

choosyfloosy Sat 05-Sep-09 21:06:56

Yes. I always had to walk away at that point tbh.

twopeople Sat 05-Sep-09 21:22:05

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plonker Sat 05-Sep-09 21:26:47

Oh God yes!

I found age 3 much much more tricky than the 'terrible twos'.

Dd1 was 3 when dd2 was born so I put a lot of it down to that. There were no significant life-changes in dd2's life when she turned 3 and I found her exceptionally difficult at this age too.

<sigh> this too will pass ... repeat ad nauseum

Feelingoptimistic Sat 05-Sep-09 21:29:04

Thank you ladies, I am feeling a bit more sane now, and feel able to face tomorrow !
Twopeople - thanks for saying it's ok to feel that way !

NightShoe Sat 05-Sep-09 21:30:42

Oh yes, we never had the terrible twos, I was always mystified by friends with two year olds sprawled across the floor in a redfaced rage. Until I got a threenager.....

But mummy....

I'm fed up...

I'm bored...

Play xyz mummy..not like that..do this..and this..that is not right...

I don't like wearing that mummy, it is not fabulous...

arrrghhhh!

Ceebee74 Sat 05-Sep-09 21:31:11

I know exactly how you feel - Ds1 is 3.2 is totally exhausting!! Constant demands for attention, switching from one activity to another every 5 minutes, not listening and doing as he is asked.....

By the time he is in bed at 7.30, I am knackered but as that is the only 'me' time I get, I tend to stay up later than I should - which makes it a vicious circle grin I also have a 9-month old so seem to run around after one or the other from 6.45am until 7.30 pm!!

Twopeople glad there is light at the end of the tunnel as it really doesn't seem like it at the moment.

NightShoe Sat 05-Sep-09 21:31:30

P.S wine helps muchly with such behaviour....

choufleur Sat 05-Sep-09 21:35:09

am i allowed to drink wine from 7amish to 7pmish nightshoe? and if not "why"?, "why?", <<stamps foot>> "but i WANT TO"

Feelingoptimistic Sat 05-Sep-09 21:44:11

Ceebee74 - that's exactly what I do ! Stay up too late enjoying a bit of peace and quiet, and then really regret it when I get woken up in the morning.

I really do feel so much better now. Thank you.

llynnnn Sat 05-Sep-09 22:10:10

i could've written the op! dd is 3.2 and up until the last couple of weeks i thought she'd become a lovely, kind and reasonable little girl after the HUGE tantrums of the terrible 2's! now she has changed again and can be very stroppy, argumentative, bossy and just not listening! it is very tiring! I was putting it down to dd2 being born (shes now 11weeks) and have been trying to give her so much attention and just feel like its thrown back in my face a lot of the time!!

Don't get me wrong I love her to bits and she is also very loving, witty, clever and caring (esp towards dd2). pleased to hear that dd isnt the only 3 year old to be like this and its perfectly normal behaviour for a threenager (thanks nightshoe, i like that description!)

good luck everyone, they will soon be 4!!

IdrisTheDragon Sat 05-Sep-09 22:11:50

DD is 3.11. She would not stop talkign earlier on. Just went on and on and on and on and on.

She is normally quite lovely but I do wish for an off switch sometimes...

FiveGoMadInDorset Sat 05-Sep-09 22:14:11

3 has been hideous, we did manage church this evening which was good as last time she nearly burnt it down. The tantrums are awful, and yes very exhausting.

ElectricElephant Sat 05-Sep-09 22:15:02

do most of you have girls?

god, i'm not looking forward to this...

plonker Sat 05-Sep-09 22:17:07

ElectricElephant - yes, I have 3 nightmare adorable little girls grin

fruitstick Sat 05-Sep-09 22:28:38

DS is nearly 3.5 and drives me insane. Noone ever tells you that you get a sneak preview of the teenage years now!

It's the constant testing. I ask him not to jump on the sofa, so he'll stand on the sofa. I ask him not to stand on the sofa, so he'll lie on the sofa and roll about.

Everything I ask him comes back with a reason why he shouldn't do it. I have to admire his negotiation skills but some days I just want to run from the house screaming.

And the annoying noises! aaaarrrrrrrggggggghhhhhh

DandyLioness Sat 05-Sep-09 22:30:28

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DandyLioness Sat 05-Sep-09 22:33:15

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FiveGoMadInDorset Sat 05-Sep-09 22:34:50

Negotiation - she has cottoned on to that.

IdrisTheDragon Sat 05-Sep-09 22:38:45

<doesn't say anything about DS who is 5.9 for obvious reasons>

Nyx Sat 05-Sep-09 22:39:51

What gets to me most I think is the complete and utter ignoring that happens when I tell DD (3.6) to stop doing something. I say "Stop that...DD, stop it. Stop it. STOP NOW." And nothing happens...she doesn't even look at me. It drives me absolutely insane. If we could crack that, just about anything else would be a breeze. <sobs into cup of tea>

MissMoopy Sat 05-Sep-09 22:48:07

It most certainly is! My dd is almost 5 and still doesn't listen! Infuriating little things aren't they!?

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