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DD distraught at losing her bedroom, how can we help?

(28 Posts)
PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 17:46:07

We knocked the wall to her bedroom down. Or rather, the builders did. We told her it was happening, but she did not really comprehend what it means. She was excited about coming into our bedroom, and she knows our bedroom will be her room soon, but now her bedroom no longer exists she is devastated.

We came home to find our hallway is a long corridor, and the builder was leaving and we were talking and I did not think about DDs reaction, I completely forgot it was her bedroom and she started crying and not being understood. And we realised she was upset about her bedroom going.

I have never seen her so so upset or inconsolable, well not since she was a very little baby and unable to talk. She is upset she has nowhere to play, that our room is not her room, she is scared of the big space, and she wants her bedroom back sad.

What can we do to help her?

Swedes Mon 03-Aug-09 17:48:39

How old is she?

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 17:49:36

Swedes yes that would help wouldn't it! She is just 3.

Can she move into your room now and you move into her room/the hallway?

CarGirl Mon 03-Aug-09 17:51:19

Can you decorate a corner of your room to be more like her old room asap?

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 17:51:32

She is fine with distraction, but as soon as she walks into the hallway and sees this cavernous space where her bedroom was, she gets really upset again. She is never upset like this, about anything, she hardly has tears and when she does, they are quickly dispelled with cuddles or some distraction.

I did not think how getting rid of the only bedroom she has ever known would affect her. I feel a bit stupid not to have realised tbh.

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 17:56:02

stipey We are having the loft converted, almost done, and her room wall is being moved to put stairs to the loft in. Once it is complete, she will be in our room, and we will be upstairs in the loft (and her old room will technically have returned in some form), unfortunately, she has no room in existance right now. And although this is only for a couple of days, the reality is she will not be able to have this room as hers properly for a few weeks as we need to decorate/carpet etc.

Poor little love.

Cargirl We have her bed in our room, her flower light, a painting that was in her room in ours, her bears and some toys, and we have told her that now she is sharing with us, she can play in our room until it becomes her own room (she has not been able to play in it for a while as it was a store room blush but now its all been tidied so she can share with us).

Oh I am not a fan of building work!

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 17:56:51

I shall ask her if there is anything we can put in it to make her more comfortable. She slept in it fine last night (first night), its only the site of her bedroom being gone that is upsetting her so much sad

Swedes Mon 03-Aug-09 17:57:02

Ah a 3 year old girl. I have one of those. I'd take her to Ikea to buy some cardboard tat to make her temporary sense of homelessness more bearable. An exciting trip to get things for her new room. Emphasis on the exciting.

nickschick Mon 03-Aug-09 17:58:48

I know what will help!!!!

A tent- let her have her stuff in and a thick duvet and her blankets.

worked for our ds!!

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 18:00:57

Oh we are due a trip to ikea! I think thats a good idea. Only problem is what we do with it in the meantime! We are a bit crowded as our storage (ie the loft) is not in use!

But perhaps we can go do a reckie for us tomorrow after I finish work, and pick up a couple of small exciting things for her at the same time (make it about her). She would love that, great idea (but not good for my bank balance!)

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 18:02:23

I tent is a good idea, but nowhere to put it, unless we put it in the front room? hmm that could work.

Slubberdegullion Mon 03-Aug-09 18:06:37

Why don't you make a tent/den in your bedroom for her to sleep in. You know with blankets over chairs and the like. Even if it doesn't survive you can have lots of fun remodelling it every day.

If you could somehow afix a broom or long pole and drape a big sheet over the top you would have an instant indoor bell tent...ooh ooh and lots of cushions and maybe some solar fairy lights draped around the entrance.

<considers creating very own grown-up indoor bell tent>

kathyis6incheshigh Mon 03-Aug-09 18:08:40

She could glamp!
Tent with throws and big cushions!

Slubberdegullion Mon 03-Aug-09 18:10:21

<gets into the creative spirit>

And make a SIGN, you know

"Dd's tent. Bog off. Enter At Your Own Peril"

etc

or other appropriate 3 yo sentiments

Slubberdegullion Mon 03-Aug-09 18:12:10

yup Kathy has it. Indoor Glamping SO 2009.

Give her the big sell, it's the perfect on trend amalgamation of glamping and the staycation.

Jeez I'm sold.

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 18:14:47

Oh I am going to do that! kathy I do glamping! I have fairy lights and swathes and all sorts! I shall go dig it all out, DD loves camping.

Bedroom is cramped and small but I shall do the bell tent idea over her bed. Who cares if it is chaos?! The rest of the place is!

kathyis6incheshigh Mon 03-Aug-09 18:16:07

It could also be a bit like a fairy 4 poster bed, if you did it with muslin.
ROFL @ perfect amalgamation.

Swedes Mon 03-Aug-09 18:16:16

If you string up a washing line over the top of your double bed (just put screws in the ceiling - you can fill the holes later and touch up with paint) then put an enormous double sheet over the washing line and fasten to the edges of your bed with some stick on velcro. Then throw another sheet over the gaping end and fasten both sheets with pegs on to both the washing line and your duvet. Voila - a tent. She can play in her tent/ on your bed all day without limiting the space.

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 18:19:56

swedes she will like that, means she can bounce on mummy daddy bed, which is one of her favourite hobbies grin

I have just asked her and she wants to do it, so once we have finished tea, we will go make a den!

Swedes Mon 03-Aug-09 18:20:26

<notes beaten to the idea of a bed tent owing to over elaborate post/plans>

LOL at Slubber

Slubberdegullion Mon 03-Aug-09 18:23:57

but swedes you have created the indoor ridge tent. Perfect for girl guide camp re-enactments.

Pavlov to set the scene completely you just have to yell "DON'T TOUCH THE BLOODY SIDES" at her a few times every day.

Oh and you will have to eat heinz beans and mini sausages from a plastic bowl at least once in the bedroom tent.

MrsBadger Mon 03-Aug-09 18:25:14

could you hang up a sheet / dustsheet / tarpaulin to make it less cavernous to the casual glance?

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Mon 03-Aug-09 18:31:47

Mrsbadger - yes, DH suggested that. but its a very high victorian ceiling, with a huge hole above it! (hole? did I say hole? I mean crater!).

It has up until now, not been too invasive, this building works. Now, its invasive grin.

Poor DD, her face was just sheer horror.

I have dug out some sheets for the bedroom, we are going to go camp our room out in a mo!

PavlovtheForgetfulCat Tue 04-Aug-09 09:54:12

Much better nights sleep, put up fairy lights and a bit sheet over her bed and used a torch, jumped around for a little while then wantedthe sheet down!

Thanks for the great suggestions!

When the builders arrived this morning, she told them off for destroying her bedroom! Not upset, just very stern! ANd now she seems to accept thats the way it is now. I promised her once we are upstairs we will go shopping for some new things for her bedroom, that helped too I think!

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