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Running away!

(9 Posts)
Claire2009 Thu 18-Jun-09 21:00:20

At the park, time to go home, get in the buggy etc.

I call Ds.. "Come on then, time to go home"
Ds - NO mama - then runs in the opposite direction
Me - Ohh look Ds, I have a lollipop (sometimes I do, sometimes I don't, regardless he shouts back NO and keeps running away angry)
So, I end up chasing him, picking him up/or making him walk (which is hard, because he makes himself go limp!hmm) back to the buggy.

Any ideas how to stop him running away like this?

Walked around the corner to my friends' with him earlier, no roads so ok, but he ran off into someone's garden, I got him out and said "Ohh, you're a naughty little boy" ...and old lady heard me, and said "Why is he naughty?" I explained he kept running away & wasn't listening, she said "But that's not naughty, he's a child not a dog!" hmm
I said "Yes, he's my child" and walked away. blush hmm

beesonmummyshead Thu 18-Jun-09 21:20:01

how old is he claire? my dd is 21 months and this is her current absolute favourite game. It drives me insane.

I am quite lucky in that I live right on the moors so when we are on the moors I let her run (and don't chase her) when she gets out of sight she invariably (but not always) comes back. Is there anywhere you can let him run?

the rest of the time i do not tolerate it. The first time she starts to run i drag her back to the pushchair by her hand telling her in a VERY loud voice how naughty she is and if she does it again she will go in the pushchair. Mostly she just laughs at me, or cries because she wants me to let go of her so sh can do it again.

Second time she gets rammed in pushchair no arguing and I let her tantrum, I will only speak to her when she has calmed down, then we have a cuddle.

Sometimes children just test and test and test, consitency is the only way forward as is showing them how much this is upsetting you (I also tell my dd - when she is calm - exactly why she cannot run off, people might take hold of you, cars might hit you etc)

I don't think there is an easy fix, at least not for me (but my dd is very headstrong), but I find that if I have a plan and stick to it, then at least I feel in control if nothing else

HTH.

mrsruffallo Thu 18-Jun-09 22:09:32

I had this all day today.
I am exhausted and usually resort to threats and shouty mummy tactics blush

Claire2009 Thu 18-Jun-09 22:42:39

He's 26mths.

I am exhausted also, I bribe, grab, tell him he's naughty, is getting no treats etc.

He doesn't listen, I may as well be talking to a brick wall hmm

FluffyBunnyGoneBad Thu 18-Jun-09 22:48:02

Give him a warning, "we've got to go in 10 minutes, if you are a good boy we can come back on Monday/Tuesday etc", then in 5 mons time say "we've got to go in 5 minutes". Cheer and clap if he doesn't try to escape, "well done ds!!", or you could always get an extendable dog lead, attach it to his trousers, once the time is up just pull him in.

NumptyMum Thu 18-Jun-09 23:01:07

Really surprised at the lady saying 'that's not naughty' and that he's a child, not a dog!
a) yes, he's a young child and may not realise the implications of his behaviour, but you can't let him run off without telling him why you don't like it. He's pushing the boundaries to find out what happens, I guess.
b) actually I think there was some stuff in the news about how dog training techniques COULD actually be useful in raising children! Although the treats system doesn't seem to work in your case... I suppose you need the treats as reward after good behaviour.
c) there's a difference between saying behaviour is bad, and that your child is bad. To me it sounded like you were saying the behaviour was bad.

But to me it sounds like the chasing him has become a game to him. Sadly I've no suggestions, will watch this thread to see if anyone else has!

Claire2009 Thu 18-Jun-09 23:28:54

LMAO at extendable dog lead, how great would that look at the park grin

I've done the warnings also, "Ok Ds we're going in 5 mins"...he shouts no, runs off, plays, "Ok ds we're going now" and again, the chase begins.

DesperateHousewifeToo Fri 19-Jun-09 18:31:01

Hold on to him when you tell him it is time to go home, thn he can't run off.

Get one of those wrist straps to put on both of you when walking then he can.t run.

Lots of praise when he does do as he is told throuhgout the day.

Tis a phase. he will outgrow this soon (and then start doing something a lot worse, if he is like my two grin)

raspberrytart Fri 19-Jun-09 20:40:33

I've got a runner and he used to be exactly like what you've described. We were ok if on the reins but off them I could'nt see him for dust.I now use the reins as a threat if he is running off. He may well grow out of it-however what I do is say to him before you go to the park -ok we're going to park/wherever and then when we've had a lovely long play we can then do this(make it a good thing)I find this works with my ds but he is 3.9 and has sn, keep it clear,consise and short, do not elaborate.
if that fails use reins.
This type of behaviour is not bad its normal.
Sounds daft but if I want my ds to come to me I get down on knees and open my arms wide and he usually comes running to me
Its an exhausting phase and I used to favour the car instead of walking 10mins to get the others from school
Good Luck

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