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What to do with tot while suffering SPD. Any advice?

10 replies

clutter · 17/06/2009 11:40

Hello! I was just wondering how anyone managed with SPD second time round. My dd is a very active (which ones aren't - i know) 22 month old. I have had PGP/SPD since week 24 I am now 32 weeks and in agony. I am on 8 Paracetamol a day and Dihydrocodeine 5 times a day have had physio and am off to see a consultant next week. I think the next stage is crutches but does that leave me housebound? Did anyone else cope with tot and SPD? I already feel rubbish about how little we go out and rely on OH to take her out at weekend but if i go on crutches i can't push the buggy or anything (it is agony to do but at least i feel i am being an ok mum, am only making it out twice a week to her little classes that she loves and are really close ie. bottom of the street).

I'm feeling a little close to the edge at the moment and can't believe i have 8 weeks to go (it is getting worse) and would REALLY appreciate some advice! Thank you ;0)
Clutter x

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christie00 · 17/06/2009 17:46

Really sorry to hear you're suffering so much - I was in same position earlier this year (and went to 41+4wks! Aaaagh!) - sad to say I had to resort to cbeebies and DVDs by the later stages...

Wish I could offer more advice, but thinking of you - it's a tough one. Don't feel you're a bad mum when it gets so you can't really do anything, as long as she's safe you're doing all you can (and she won't remember it!)

HTH

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cakesaregood · 17/06/2009 22:12

I was in similar position, so feel for you big time. No one ever talked about SPD in my circles either until AFTER we'd all had our second children! The threat of crutches got my OH moving a bit more.

We moved house when I was 33 weeks. The mattress got turned when we moved in and fresh springs seemed to really help.

Probably really useless advice, see if your OH is feeling strong sometime!!

Have they fitted you with the really attractive belt? I couldn't sit down in it, so figured it was counter-productive.

Hang on in there - enjoy the time with DD

x

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wobbegong · 17/06/2009 22:45

Clutter- God my heart goes out to you.
There are thousands of threads on here with tips for coping with SPD- these really can make a difference. But maybe you are doing them all!
I have to say that in your position I would say bugger the expense and get in some paid childcare while you loll on the sofa. Is that an option? Can you appeal to local mums- I'd be happy to have a little playmate for my DD tagging along to classes etc. to help a friend. Do swallow your pride and ask- I found no-one ever offered. Also can your partner take some annual leave? I stocked all my DH's leave up for after the baby came but I really wish I had used some before to help me when I was pregnant.

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MiaMamma · 18/06/2009 10:50

I have mild SPD, so some days are very painful and some ok. My 3yo DD is very active and feel quite sad that I can't take her out as much as I used to. Love the advice wobblegong gave - asking around friends with toddlers to have DD as a playdate for few hours - will be probably doing that!
What I've done so far is that I got DD some new DVDs to watch when I really need a rest (don't have to say that she'd watch tv all day long if she could!). Also have stocked up on colouring books, paints, cut-outs from magazines, all sorts of arty stuff - I can just sit there with her while she's busy colouring/sticking/cutting.
My DH has been taking odd days off and I have found it helpful too, so maybe your partner could do that? I'm lucky to have MIL living very close, she takes DD sometimes but mostly it's weekends. But it's still good break for me and DH.
I really feel for you, I have 5 weeks to go and I know how slowly those last weeks are going!! Good luck!!

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clutter · 22/06/2009 12:08

Thank you so much for all your suggestions i really appreciate them all, will stock up on DVDs and have found a website with brilliant colouring pages that i can just print off when i want to. It is mostly that i feel a bit of a rubbish mum, but i am going to the consultant about more pain relief tomorrow so hope it will improve. I do have the belt and it is a beauty, even caught my kin in it the other day what a beautiful sight that was!

Childcare not an option but my sister finishes teaching 3 weeks before the due date and could come up which may be meeded. To be honest it is geting worse week by week that if they offered to induce me at 38 weeks i would jump at the chance, but think it is unlikely.

Anyway thank you everyone and hope all your births go well!x Clutter

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yawningprincess · 22/06/2009 20:37

Hi clutter just wanted to let you know what I did although my circumstances were slightly different. My dd1 is 17 months and my dd2 is 5 weeks old. I suffered from 18 weeks and we were having a loft conversion and outside extension which was delayed and workman still in the office until last week! But because of the loft conversion me and my dh had to sleep on an air bed- good quality one- for 8 weeks and although it sounds like a nightmare , the air bed really did help with the SPD. When the loft was done we had the entire house decorated so I basically had to heave my 16 month old up 2 flights of stairs, I crawled everywhere as walking was too painful. Make a game of things, it helped ease the frustration! My little one started to make the straining noises I used to make!

I paid to see a Chiropractor, and I kid you not she was a miracle worker. Pyshio didn't work for me and the belts were useless.

In labour I spent most of the time stood up but when I got tired and the contractions got stronger I found pushing my pubic bone helped elevate some of the pressure.

I did it with no pain relief and apart from a few after pains I am fighting fit and was immediately after!!

I really sympathise with you- the worst part for me was when I was 34 onward my lady garden swelled because of the pressure, I looked permanently turned on down and I can assure you I wasn't!!!

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BiscuitStuffer · 22/06/2009 21:23

If you're in london I can recommend a great osteopath

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KERALA1 · 22/06/2009 21:34

Crutches really helped me with the pain as it took away the impact on walking pain which was the worst I found. If you do get crutches brace yourself for the general public asking whether you have a fall and old men insisting on carrying bags for you. Seats on public transport guaranteed with a bump and crutches! Luckily I was a first time mum so didnt have a toddler to think about.

Is your garden secure? Could she play around while you sit in a chair? Can you go and stay with your parents? You may just have to get in lots of DVDs/arts and crafts (see other thread!). Its not for long good luck it really is tough if it gets to that stage.

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BetsyBoop · 22/06/2009 21:36

It is bloomin' hard looking after a toddler and heavily pregnant with SPD, you have my sympathy {hugs}

Great advice already, I'll add some more things that worked for me.

We bought DD (22months when DS was born) one of those mini trampolines & had it inside (DS was born in Nov mind) for days when I just couldn't get out. Fantastic for burning off those beans and you can use it after in the garden too

I got to the point when I couldn't lift her into her high chair, so she used to climb up a little set of kitchen steps to get in (with help of course!) & thought that was great fun. DH also showed her how to do "slidy-bums" coming downstairs, which she used to love (again couldn't carry her, she hadn't mastered walking down & was crap at crawling down backwards) - both proved very handy when I ended up with a c/s & definitely couldn't lift her!

It's really just about finding things that help you to survive the next few weeks. It doesn't make you a bad Mum doing that. It seems a long time when you're in the midst of it, but it doesn't last forever.

If you are like me you will start wondering how on earth you are going to cope with toddler AND a new baby. Honestly that is easier than toddler + bump + SPD, I'm not just saying it, really it is

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Clydesdaleclopper · 24/06/2009 15:23

My sympathies go out to you. I suffer from SPD, though I'm not pregnant, mine just never got any better. DS is 20 months old and very lively and it is difficult. I can't push a buggy so we go by car, he walks or I wear him in a sling on my back. Although he is heavy this is easier than trying to push him.

Instead of the crutches you could try a wheelchair then they can sit on your lap - the NHS don't provide them but you can borrow one from the Red Cross.

Get a fun pod that you can pop them in to play at the table that way you don't have to bend down.

Good luck

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