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Behaviour/development

dc is 5 and reading books meant for 7 year olds, I am worried!

63 replies

deneuve · 15/06/2009 21:28

He is galloping through the well known series of H. Henry, Jeremy Strong, Jack Stalwart, CIA, Astrosaurs, and lots more. He is also very good at writing and numeracy. I am a bit perplexed about this, as it has all happened very suddenly, no coaching or pushing on our part, infact lots of leaving him to get on...What worries me is that I personally do not see any practical benefit of being so advanced, I even discouraged him from reading at one point . I guess my worry is that a big gap will develop between him and his peers,that he might turn into a weirdo. No basis for this, he has a bunch of friends, little mates come round regularly. But sometimes I notice that he talks about things his friends know nothing about (references to Jeremy Strong Books for example...).. Can someone tell me if he can be advanced at certain subjects, but still be a normal kid, able to socialise with his peers. Sorry about my ramble, English is not my first language and I feel anxious about ds.

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Hulababy · 15/06/2009 21:33

I wouldn't worry. To be reading two or three years ahead of their game is within norml ranges IME. DD has been like this from reception and still is. She is definitely a very normal little girl and in no way gifted r anything. There are a few children we know who are similar.

I think with reading it is often one of those things that just "clicks" all of a sudden and they are suddenly able to read pretty much anything.

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slayerette · 15/06/2009 21:34

It sounds fairly normal to me - DS (just turned 6) is reading similar books and it hasn't caused a problem. He's certainly not a weirdo. I don't really understand why you would want to discourage him from reading? And why would you think he is abnormal because he can read?? Children vary wildly in terms of where they fall on the academic spectrum and are very accepting of what others can and can't do - they worry about it far less than parents do.

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Shitemum · 15/06/2009 21:38

I was a voracious reader by the age of 8.
At the age of 12 I decided to 'give up' reading as my peers thought I was strange and didn't understand half the words I used.

If English is not your first language does your DS speak yours? If so maybe encourage him to read and write in it, that'll slow him down!

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deneuve · 15/06/2009 21:40

oh thank you, i guess it is because his reception teacher pointed out that his class mates can only read the simple one word books, and I panicked..and worried that he will become the antisocial little lad with his books and nobody wanting to talk to him..he is actually not like that at all. I am super anxious mum, so i need mumsnet to get some perspective. Thank you.

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ByTheSea · 15/06/2009 21:42

It is perfectly plausible to be a 'normal kid' and be advanced academically. Both DH and I were, as are our DDs.

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deneuve · 15/06/2009 21:43

He can speak and read mine already, not to the same level as English, and he is not interested in concentrating more on his 2nd language and I don't want to push him. He prefers English as we "are in English" lol.

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cory · 16/06/2009 09:10

Dd was reading extracts from the Lord of the Rings aged 6. She has always been very successful socially; there is simply no definite correlation between the two (as long obviously as the child has the social skills not to keep boasting about his proficiency). And tbh to read 7yo books for a 5yo is not particularly advanced; I'd say well within normal range. Lots of 5yos in dd's school were doing that.

What you want is not to slow down his academic skills, but to try to make sure that his social skills keep pace. Social stories are good, talking about how other people feel, that sort of thing. Eventually he will learn to adjust his vocabulary to the people he is speaking to.

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sleeplessinstretford · 16/06/2009 09:16

you aren't worried- you are trying to show off! I could read when I was 3 (my older sister taught me) and my parents had no idea until I went to school and came home with a reading book way up the 'reading scheme' (both parents are teachers and my mum apparently said to dad'sarah can't read' to which my sisters replied 'she can-Go on Sarah,read mum a story' I never had any problems making friends due to being 'advanced/super bright' you love it really don't you?!

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morningpaper · 16/06/2009 09:21

I wouldn't worry - chances are (if it is a normal school) that there are one or two kids in his class of a similar ability. Yes he will be brighter than his peers, but there are always a few children like that, just as there are always a few children who are 'behind'. I have to admit I often stop my six year old from reading because she has a nose in a book all day so I am constantly grabbing books and bunging them away so she will interact with real people! But as long as he is not completely engrossed all day then I wouldn't worry.

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cory · 16/06/2009 09:22

well, if she loves it, sleepless, then so she should. I think there is a far too strong tendency on MN to see brightness as something isolating and scary, rather than as one more of those many things we can enjoy about our children: something positive and pleasant, like having beautiful eyes or a cheeky grin or being good at jumping. We need an attitude of fun!

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sleeplessinstretford · 16/06/2009 09:26

I am not saying it's a bad thing that she loves it... but dressing it up as being worried is the bit I am querying....

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GooseyLoosey · 16/06/2009 09:33

Would agree with Cory - social skills are separate to accademic achievement. Let him go at his own pace with book and just monitor his social skills, helping where necessary. The only thing to watch out for is that as he moves up to books for older children, the stories and content is still broadly age appropriate

I also think that your ds is clever but pretty normal. Ds has just turned 6 and is reading Ernest Hemmingway at the moment. He is also reading the Illiad and a few books on how the body works. His social skills are terrible, but I don't think they are connected with what he is reading.

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morningpaper · 16/06/2009 09:41

Ds has just turned 6 and is reading Ernest Hemmingway at the moment.

Sweet! I have given up on the age-appropriate books. My DD takes out her full compliment of Crap Children's Novels from the library each saturday (16 fgs!) and I can't even be arsed to read the back covers. But DH spotted a teenage romance last week and hid it...

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GooseyLoosey · 16/06/2009 09:44

Glad you approve MP - I have to admit to a small moment of parental pride there, especially as I am mired in dealing with the social side of ds's life at the moment.

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morningpaper · 16/06/2009 09:50

Oh yes definitely, it's marvellous. My DD just reads rubbish - she doesn't care what it is, as long as it is interspersed with pencil drawings of anorexic fairies.

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Acinonyx · 16/06/2009 10:14

Oh my dd is fixated on those mp and we get armfuls from the library. Unfortunately she is 3 and alas can't read yet so I have to read them to her (deep groan). Can't wait until she can read them for herself - or improve her taste in books, preferably both.

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annoyedmum · 16/06/2009 11:59

I do think there is a tendency to show off on mumsnet though cory,especially about reading and giftedness.
Enjoy it by all means but stop going on about it![not aimed specifically at cory btw]
I mean IQ and ability is a spectrum and advanced early development doesn't equate with giftedness imho.
I do remember a boy from primary school building his own computer in about 1973 ~now thats[maybe] gifted.
And people studying maths,further maths and pure maths A levels,or having all As in O levels and Alevels in the 70's~very good but still commonplace at school tbh.

At medical school they were capable hard working and bright enough ~ again,a spectrum.Not the brightest though.

Lots of children are clever its the able end or normality,just stop calling them gifted fgs.
Also lots of children/people are clever in different ways

Sorry but it is so boastful and ott.

Not to mention you are probably going to raise a generation of over confident bigheaded children which won't do a lot for their popularity.

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singersgirl · 16/06/2009 12:06

Just out of genuine curiosity, which Hemingway is your 6 year old reading? Off the top of my head, I can't think of any that would be very interesting to even a very bright 6 year old.

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annoyedmum · 16/06/2009 12:18

deneuve your ds is 5, very good at writing,numeracy and is reading lots of books alone ,also popular and has lots of friends round...
Your "anxiety" would be more correctly expressed as
"My ds is so clever I'm terribly worried he's too clever and too good at everything oh dear what should I do... maybe put him up a couple of years so he can discuss his books with like minded classmates "
or maybe post it on mn to say how clever he is[maybe in G & T or would that be too obvious?]

You are most definitely boasting and no mistake

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pagwatch · 16/06/2009 12:23

I am not having a great day so I have clicked on Mumsnet to find something to make me laugh - and here it is. All the joys of MN in one thread

Thanks all

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GooseyLoosey · 16/06/2009 12:27

Singersgirl - The Old Man and the Sea. His Grandma was reading it and told him about it so he wanted to read it too (can't say it would have been my choice). He seems to have enjoyed it.

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pesme · 16/06/2009 12:30

dd finds hemmingway's staccato language too limiting in the narrative context adn she is too young (5) to explore the emotional richness of the subtext. therefore she is reading chaucer and beowulf. we have many a merry evening chatting in old english.

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pagwatch · 16/06/2009 12:31

see...

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annoyedmum · 16/06/2009 12:38

english ~ ha! tis too easy for my dd 2.2 who this week will speak only in greek

[hastens to add she is not compromised socially by this and can speak all other known languages too just from watching the odd bit of sky]

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mumof2222222222222222boys · 16/06/2009 12:40

I read Watership Down at 6 and think I have turned out relatively normal. Probably a disappointment for my parents who (briefly) might have thought they had a genius for a daughter!

I now read bookds like"Ian is a Dustman" about 10x a night. how the mighty have fallen

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