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19 month DD .Play group eating Manners HELP!

(8 Posts)
notsosure Mon 09-May-05 20:34:56

My DD, 19 months old, has no table manners when at the play group we go to occasionally.

She sat down next to a plate of food today - grabbed a bit of banana and ran off with it! She wouldn't go back after that, she was too busy exploring and playing.

The food on the plate wasn't all that DD likes (there were sultanas there, that she doesn't like, - but most of it was OK - clementines, bananas, rice cakes)

When I tried to get her to sit down, she just wriggled around, stood up and made a horrible soft screaming sound (her new voice!).

All I could see was a sea of perfectly behaved toddlers who were sat down, concentrating on eating their snack and even they looked a bit horrified (like their mums)

I was mortified.

DD goes to a nursery 2 mornings a week, and is an only child. She eats lunch there.

At hone, I mainly feed her, and she usually eats quite well.
Thing is - I know she will have to eat better communally eventually, but am I putting too much pressure on her (and myself!)

This afternoon at home, I sat down with her in her small table and chair (usually reserved for play) and we ate cut up banana together. She ate it fine.

I will also talk to the nursery she goes to and ask them how she behaves when she has her lunch there.

I am going to make sure I go to a play group with her at least once a week to get her used to eating communally (which would make it x3 times a week - and at least I'll see how things are going)

I'm also going to have a snack with her on her little table as much as possible ie once a day if time permits.

HAS ANYONE ANY VIEWS ON WHAT I'VE WRITTEN AND SUGGESTIONS ABOUT HOW I CAN IMPROVE THINGS?

THANKS VEY MUCH

Notsosure

Nemo1977 Mon 09-May-05 20:42:21

I think just learnign by role play would help. DS eats a lot better when he eats with us so as u said sitting at the table with her etc should help. I also wouldnt worry too much as at a tots group theres soo much stuff to do eating seems boring..lol

notsosure Mon 09-May-05 21:04:04

Thanks for that.
What I don't understand is how the other children just sit down at the small table and eat like that. DD is too active to just stay there.

You are right about the distractions at the play group. I know that DD is very active and too excited by the toys around her to just stay there.

She does need some training to live in the "real world", though, I think. But I can see where she is coming from.

I expect those other childen at the play group have been going there from the year dot, so they are used to the sitting down eating routine.

Food for thought (no pun intended )

notsosure Mon 09-May-05 21:04:06

Thanks for that.
What I don't understand is how the other children just sit down at the small table and eat like that. DD is too active to just stay there.

You are right about the distractions at the play group. I know that DD is very active and too excited by the toys around her to just stay there.

She does need some training to live in the "real world", though, I think. But I can see where she is coming from.

I expect those other childen at the play group have been going there from the year dot, so they are used to the sitting down eating routine.

Food for thought (no pun intended )

Nemo1977 Tue 10-May-05 15:54:16

not so sure they probably have been going a while. I know DS is great when he eats at playgroups but i think thats because he realises that all the other kids r there. However he will onl manage about 4/5mins max.

robin3 Tue 10-May-05 16:04:44

Got exactly the reverse issue....DS and angel at nursery...never turns his plate up....eats everything, sits on his little chair (no harness) etc. But at home uses us as target practice. We both have to grit our teeth and ignore it because when he sees it's getting to us he grins and does it all the more! We've concluded that he finds us boring compared to watching his mates nibble with him.
Have no advice to share....what do I know!

overload Tue 10-May-05 20:42:06

I work at a playgroup 5 times a week. Some children will sit and eat their snack other children may not. If you still have concerns ask the playgroup to be more involved with your child and encourage your child to sit with the other children and maybe talk about what foods we eat and discuss different textures and size. This may encourage your child to sit more, but please don't get upset many children do not like to site down for any length of times every child is different, as is mine.

notsosure Wed 11-May-05 12:25:14

Thanks for your replies.
I think from the answere I've got I can conclude all children are different, as are the mums!
I realise I come under the worrying/paranoid variety!

At her nursery yestedy she ate with the other kids no problem, I was told. And smiled al ot too!
However at night it was a different story.
I fed her the same food as me and my husband and she hardly ate anything and mucked about with the plate a lot.
I think the reason for that was tha she had consumed too much milk earlier, so yet another possible reason for not eating well. (That wasn't the case at playgroup the other day, when she was definitely hungry.)
I think there are loads of reasons for not eating and it is best for me not to worry so much, as you guys have said.
No magic answers!
Notsosure

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