DD (9) walked in on us engaged in noisy enthusiastic duvet-free sex last night

[OrmIrian]

Walked in, turned on her heel and walked out. We lay like statues, totally mortified. DH said I should go and speak to her. I did, cringing like mad. DD was clearly embarrassed but OK. DH went downstairs to make some tea. DD called out to me that she felt ill - I went to see her, tucked her in, stroked her forehead, said goodnight, went back to bed.

She seemed find next day but studiously avoided the subject - she even explained why she got up (to find the kitten apparently) and talked about when she felt ill. But not the 'elephant in the room' so to speak.

Either she is remarkably cool (I'd have died at her age!) or she's pretending. How can I tell is she's OK?

It was bloosy 11.30 at night. We should have been safe surely.

[Slouchy]

eeek.

Yikes.

etc.

[LoveMyGirls]

It's times like that I dread.......sorry that doesn't help.

I'm not looking forward to the time when my dd's will go to bed after us.

[OrmIrian]

As you say slouchy!

Last line was meant to read 'bloody 11.30' btw...

[CatMandu]

Oh God, my 9 year old dd can't even watching people kissing on tv, she would be mortified. Sounds like your dd is handling it rather well, I think you should leave it be, you spoke to her at the time there's no need to keep referring to it.

[ShowOfHands]

Just leave it. She'll be fine. You'll be fine. She will knock next time.

[OrmIrian]

DD cringes too at kissing and the like. That is what is so upsetting.

It wouldn't have been so bad if it had been lazy, half-asleep duvet-covered almost asleep action.

[mrsmaidamess]

Are you sure she even knew what you were doing?
Can you say something like 'I bet you were surprised to find me and Daddy having a kiss and a cuddle last night, weren't you?'

Or was there no way it could be construed as 'just that'?

[aGalChangedHerName]

Oh god poor you.

If it helps i had a lecture from ds1 about keeping the noise down whilst having sex when his gf stays over (they are 17 and 16 btw)

Our walls are rather thin then.

[OrmIrian]

Unlikely maidamess

I think we will just follow her lead and stay in denial....

[dinny]

bet she didn't notice half as much as you think - or click

she's obviously not upset, don't feel bad - it's natural!!! (sorry, state the obvious!)

[gigglewitch]

blardy hell.
I think I'm reading this thinking "that will be us in another year or two".
Stuff happens.
Try not to panic over it, and hopefully she won't either. Perhaps leave it a few days and try and have another bit of a word with her, say you're concerned etc, maybe that you know she wouldn't be able to talk to any of her friends about it? Is she likely to understand what she saw?

[OrmIrian]

Knock on doors! Now there's an idea.

We don't do privacy in our house (apart from DS#1 who is getting a bit hung up about it atm) but assumed that that time of night we'd be safe.

[luckylady74]

If it helps - in retrospect I have realised that I walked in on my parents several times, but despite knowing the facts of life I never realised what they were doingbecause I'm a bit slow off the mark! She may just be embarassed you were naked iyswim.
I did actually knock on a flatmates bedroom door and ask if she'd hurt herself and that was in my twenties

[Littleladyloulou]

Eek

Can't offer any advice on what's happened but can say that my parents had a tiny discreet bolt very high up on their bedroom door (too high for a child to reach), I remember as a child getting up in the night to go to their room and finding the door wouldn't push open, but I never cottoned on why even after I knew the basics about the birds and the bees.

Maybe something to consider? Or is it shutting the stable door after the horse has bolted (ROFL) (on own) (nobody else finds it funny, LLLL)...

[gigglewitch]

yes, funny LLL

Brainwash the buggers to knock. My dses still do it even when half-asleep I recommend it

[brimfull]

have always dreaded this

we usually sleep with the door open,so close it when we want privacy,the fact the door is shut makes a statement to older dd but younger ds ..god I cringe.

I have a friend who is mega open with her kids-even leaves her dildo lying around

[twoluvlykids]

A-hem - dd once walked in on dh & me ...

on the kitchen table!!!!

I rolled off the table and landed in the dog's box, dh managed to hide his bits under the table...it was dark, she went away quickly...

never spoke about it!

[OrmIrian]

Kitchen table!

[gigglewitch]

you feeling better yet

[jnmum]

I remember finding my mum's vibrator when I was about 10!!!and some porn!! never mentioned it though.

Later when I was about 14 I walked in to my parents room and they were having sex, noone ever mentioned it and I wasn't shocked...although I was alot older

[Heated]

I can remember overhearing my parents and offering to call an ambulance!!

[DevilsAdvocaat]

is it possible she was half asleep/sleep walking?

[Heated]

you were helping dh with cramp?

[girlandboy]

twoluvlykids - oh dear, and fell into the dog's box

My dd is 13 and unfortunately we have an old house where there is no upstairs landing, therefore no bedroom door. To get to dd's bedroom you have to walk through our room! Trouble is, she is getting later and later at dropping off to sleep. By the time she's asleep we're too tired!

[twinsetandpearls]

pmsl luckylady at have you hurt yourself.