temper tantrums... argh!

[Mishee]

My very sweet natured daughter has reached meltdown twice this week. She gets into a complete strop and then can't get herself out of it. If I'm holding her, she wants her daddy and if he takes her she wants me again - she doesn't know what she wants and nothing seems to pacify her. She goes completely rigid. Normally if she's being umpy I can distract her or make her laugh, but this is something completely different. Today it was because I wouldn't let her stand on the dressing table. Even the offer of wearing her wellies to nursery was met by chucking them on the floor. In the end I manhandled her out of the door into the car where she calmed down and sobbed 'Dada, Dada'. When we got to nursery she had calmed right down and when I phoned later, they said she was fine!
Any advice gladly received.

[citronella]

No advice (could do with some myself) just empathy.
I don't really believe there is a true answer. The tantrums probably do more damage to your mental state than hers.