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how sociable is your 4yr old

(6 Posts)
zimzam Fri 24-Oct-08 11:48:38

My dd is 4.5 yrs old and has just started reception so I've been holding off taking her to after school clubs until Jan or so once she's fully settled (still on half days at the mo).
She has only one or two friends from before school that she has semi-regular play dates with and I'm waiting for her to establish some new school buddies to invite home.
How many play dates do your dc have in the week? I'm wondering what's the norm and if I should be helping her socialise more and develop those essential skills.

Flier Fri 24-Oct-08 12:32:11

I'm keen to see what is the "norm" too. My Ds started school in August (age 5) and I've noticed that quite a few of the other kids seem to have fairly regular playdates, but my DS doesn't. I wonder if I should be doing more, or if it will happen naturally (or not!).

zimzam Fri 24-Oct-08 19:58:52


Boyswillbeboys Sat 25-Oct-08 14:03:09

With DS1 we used to meet up with other school mums once a week or so, just to the playground after school, and maybe every other week have someone back to play and have tea. He would then get invited to other people's, but I would usually go with him.

DS2 on the other hand is not very sociable and would happily just play with his brother! DS2 started reception in september and I haven't invited any of his classmates yet as I think he is finding it all quite tiring. DS1's friends tend to have younger siblings about the same age as my DS2 though so there are quite often "joint" playdates where the youngers and olders are all invited.

I would say that at our school there are lots of kids who have playdates several times a week, and there are others who don't seem to do much at all, so there's no right or wrong. I also find that it is the mothers of only-children who seem keen to find a friend to play with their child, whereas those with 2 or more find it too much hassle!! smile

Overmydeadbody Sat 25-Oct-08 14:17:38

Ever since starting nursery DS has wanted friends to come home for playdates, so I have always invited them.

Now he's yr1 he goes home with a friend probably once a week, sometimes once a fortnight, and has a friend come over to ours after school about as many times.

I just invited kids home (via the mum/dad of course) and people tend to reciprocate.

So to answer your question DS has at least one 'play-date' a week.

zimzam Sun 26-Oct-08 17:15:15

Thanks, that's a bit reassuring then as i thought most had more than one playdate a week. My daughter also has a younger brother who she's happy to play with.
I am hoping she'll make some nice (!) new friends at school and that she'll be happy enough going to some after school club in a couple of months. Have heard 'Perform' are good for building confidence, does anyone have any experience of this or heard about it?

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