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2.2 year old turned into a wild child overnight. Help?

(13 Posts)
PavlovtheCat Mon 15-Sep-08 17:57:55

My gorgeous, wonderful, happy, but independent and willful (?) child has gone from being fun and controllable to a nightmare to understand and control within days.

She has always had a stubborn streak, for example, she loves to clean her teeth, but she has to do it, and refuses to let us do it for her (we do, but its a battle). She likes to try to put her own socks on before we do, and now she can.

She is very active, alert, into everything, on the go for the entire time she is awake.

She has been having tantrums, to be expected, and it has been manageable, usually when she is tired or hungry or both. They are very definite, last for about 10 minutes.

But over the last two days she has had more tantrums that are hard to manage, she has become very hyperactive, she throws things, hits, kicks much much more. She tips over her table, tips things out of her bowl. Sometimes it is in what seems to be anger, and sometimes it is defiant - she will do it, and look at me whilst doing it.

She is blowing raspberries at us when we ask her to do something, she says 'what' when we say something to her, and she gets into states a lot easier.

She is not eating very well, and is fighting her bedtime routine, but she is actually sleeping much better than she has been recently so I dont think its tiredness.

I have been poorly over the last week, could this be why she is playing up, because I have been less able to cope? Or is this an inevitable part of her development that we need to find a way of handling.

Everything so far has happened in a timely fashion, we have to an extent seen it coming, it has been slow enough for us to be prepare for it. But we did not see this coming!!!

I found last night before bedtime unbearable, and had to walk out of the room, and for the first time since she has been here, I looked forward to her going to nursery so they could deal with her.

Is this normal? how long before it passes? (please don't say when they leave home!)

PavlovtheCat Mon 15-Sep-08 18:13:28

Right now she came home in a great mood from nursery, and withing minutes got upset as DH went out and could not take her with him, cue crying, tipping over things, throwing her toys from her box.

She does not want to cuddle me, and wont eat anything.
sad. And she is generally wingeing.

What has happened to my girl?

TheProvincialLady Mon 15-Sep-08 18:16:21

It could be because you have been unwell but I would bet my bottom dollar that it is because she is about to become unwell - especially as she wouldn't eat just now. My DS is normally angelic but when he is about to get a cold he bites, whinges and yells.

LunaFairy Mon 15-Sep-08 18:19:15

My ds is 2.9 yrs is full of energy and is very, very stubborn. The cleaning teeth incident happens in our house as well. We're now going through the phase of not wanting to get dressed and would rather freeze his bottom off!

I've now got to the point that when he plays up - I warn him that a toy will be taken away - a beloved car or something. That normally does the trick - alongside the time out spot!

He goes through phases of playing me up. He has been an angel the last 3-4 wks and suddenly turned over the weekend.

Nursery couldn't come sooner for both him and me - he doesn't start til January. If I could get him in sooner then I would (they are full up)! I think its what he needs. Some time out from mummy too will do him the world of good.

I make sure we go out each morning to the park (come rain or shine). He has a good run around. Toddler groups are too contained for him. He gets lots of fresh but sometimes I can't do enough to burn off his energy.

It's all normal toddler behaviour - Then we have to deal with the teens in the future!! x

PavlovtheCat Mon 15-Sep-08 18:19:27

Oh god shock don't say that!! She can't be ill, firstly I can't cope with me sick and her sick, and secondly we are going on holiday on Sunday, I am working hard to get well, but if she is sick, we wont be able to go!!

We have to go, it is our first wedding anniversary, and we are staying in a posh hotel for one evening, and then in a yurt for a week!

I hope you are wrong, but the theory makes sense...hmm

PavlovtheCat Mon 15-Sep-08 18:24:26

Thing is - I can cope fine with her usual manic self, its done with fun and excitement and she just loves life. Like your DS luna DD needs to be run, she needs lots and lots of stimulation.

Perhaps she has been bored in the last few days? DH took her to the park yesterday though, even though we did not do as much, she did some stuff - park, painting, puzzles.

She does keep saying she is hungry, but wont eat, she would quite happily eat an ice cream though! Right this second, she saw a packet of crisps left on the side by DH, and wants those now. I showed her the sausage casserole and she started crying,' noooooo, I hungry, i hungry, i hungry. i hungry' but she wont touch any of the food I offer her.

Cathpot Mon 15-Sep-08 18:24:44

Are you sure she isnt coming down with something? Not eating, sleeping lots and being horrid sounds very like the build up we get before an ear infection is diagnosed.If not, I also find if I'm tired or ill then I can slip into a series of confrontations with my DD (also 'spirited') as I dont ahve the patience to jolly her out of it or stay calm myself. Have just this week unearthed the old sticker chart from the cupboard, whcih we dig out when we hit a bad patch. This time its about being polite when she asks for things or speaks to us (she's 4 in november not sur ehow old your DD is) but something like that can work as it gives them a reason to be positive. Hope things get better, I would get her ears checked though!

PavlovtheCat Mon 15-Sep-08 18:26:06

cathpot - she is 2.2

Cathpot Mon 15-Sep-08 18:36:36

AH, yes, long day, just looked at the title. I really think she is probably off colour, sorry! On the plus side, a large bottle of calpol and you can probably still go and enjoy yourself, I am always amazed at how the sticky pink juice of happiness can restore bounce in the sickest infant. If she is just going through a difficult pahse, it will pass, hang in there adjust your strategies a little and it will be ok. Probably too young for sticker chart type things but never too young for the old over doing the praise for good behaviour and letting attention seeking behaviour get minimum attention.

PavlovtheCat Mon 15-Sep-08 18:42:29

cathpot - we usually do the ignore bad behaviour, praise good behaviour. however, at the moment she is such a monstor if we ignore her she would destroy the house!!

For example, yesterday she was really cross before bed. She did not want daddy to take her trousers off ready for bed, and tried to put them back on. She wanted the potty and decided to try to go in one of her toy saucepans (she is sort of potty training, not fully done yet). Dh said not in that lets get your potty, and he got it for her. She put it on our bed, he took it off and told her potties live on the floor. She threw a tantrum about this as she wanted it on the bed, DH took it off, she put it on, DH took it off, she put it back on. She refused to sit on it, and wee'd on the floor right next to it, crying her eyes out, then grabbed her potty and threw it across the room (for a 2yo she has a good throw!).

it has just all come out of nowhere. We have had moments of it. But only bits.

Its like she has been fed something with E numbers in!!!

PavlovtheCat Mon 15-Sep-08 18:53:06

I just showed her a fork of food and she run away from me 'nooooooo' and wants daddy. Not me.

LunaFairy Mon 15-Sep-08 19:15:11

Just put my ds down to bed. I realised earlier today that his MMR could be making him fractious since the weekend. I'm hoping for a better day tomorrow.

Cat, your postings sound just like my house hold! Maybe she is feeling a little under the weather, also if you're not well they always pick up on it and make life harder.

It could be a mixture of things, she could be striving for independance, pushing the boundries, frustration, tiredness, growth sprurt. I'm sure you'll both get through this stage quickly but at the time it feels never ending.

PavlovtheCat Mon 15-Sep-08 19:41:19

luna I just forced myself to stay calm for her bedtime routine, which has become very very difficult. She becomes so argumentative!

She refused to get into bed, and refused to have cuddles, so I just kept putting her on my lap and cuddled her, wrapped blanket around her and pretended she was my baby again, she likes that so laughed with me and snuggled, for a moment.

Instead of leaving all stressed, I was determined this evening not to do that, I hate the last thing she sees is mummy scowling/frowning/looking unhappy. Finally got her settled, for now at least, with love you DD, sleep well and her still in her bed as I closed the door!

Phew. I feel drained, that was hard!!!

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