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DD just started Pre school, really shy, not joining in, any others mums with children like this / used to be like this?

(4 Posts)
Spotsanddots Mon 08-Sep-08 19:54:42

Hi there, My DD1 just turned 3 has started pre school, 4 mornings a week. She cried a little when i left her, but has managed to stay and seems to enjoy it. She is eager to go every day, but hasnt managed to join in very much. She has spoken a little bit at school, but wont sit down for a snack and sticks close to the teacher and teacher assistant for the whole session. Anyone else had experience of this or in the same boat as me? Its such a worry as all the other children seem so much more confident with no worries and my little one is so shy and withdrawn. At home she is full of life , chatty, plays well and is a real joy. I am hoping she will grow out of it. I would love to hear any ideas, or from any other mums with shy little ones.

Acinonyx Mon 08-Sep-08 20:32:42

Your dd is doing much better than mine if she is eager to go every day. My dd had been going to nursery but when we moved, just before she turned 3, we switched to a CM which is so much better - no more tears and always eager to go (really makes me realise how tough nursery was).

I'm not planning sending dd to preschool at all as she's so shy - but may reconsider next year when she's 3.5, to meet more of the kids who will be going to school. I am so hoping she will grow out of it.

Some kids are very confident - it's just different temperaments. Your dd doesn't sound THAT shy TBH - if it was that bad, she would be begging not to go (BTDT). And it's very early days - I'm sure she'll be fine.

spudballoo Mon 08-Sep-08 20:39:13

Sounds like she's doing great if she's keen to go!

I think it's easy to think that ALL the other children are confident etc. But it won't be the case, some will be like your daughter, some will be crying and not want to go at all, and some will be super confident. Just like we are as adults in fact.

My DS1, 3 on Thursday, goes to nursery a few days a week and has done since he was 10mths old. He has a wonderful time, but it's only VERY recently that he's started to really look forward to it and be very happy to scamper in.

He's naturally a little shy, at classes he takes a while to warm up, in a big social group he often will play at the edge of the group, happy but just watching not joining in...and he's been like this since he was a baby.

I don't think he'll ever be the life and soul of the party, although he's a very happy, bouncey, cheeful little boy. But then my husband has a very similar personality.

I'm waffling but just wanted to say that she's doing great to be so keen to go, and she'll settle down in to it soon enough.

Hope this helps a little.

Spotsanddots Mon 08-Sep-08 20:44:13

Thank you so much, Yes i think i am worrying too much. I am sure she will mix with the others eventually. The teachers have been great. I just need to give her time to settle in. She hasnt done a full week yet! I just cant help worrying Thanks for the reassurance x

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