DS keeps touching my norks - blush(18 Posts)
I'm totally about posting this, so go easy, but I need some perspective on an issue that's making me increasingly uncomfortable.
Ds aged 4.5 has a new interest: my wobbly bits! He keeps lifting up my top to touch my stomach which makes me flinch (and makes him laugh) and when cuddling nuzzles up against my norks, so I just shift him a bit and give him a cuddle. Today he kept patting them and then gave them a kiss which made pull back in surprise & I can now feel myself tense when he comes in for a cuddle, his eyes fixed on his points of interest!
Do I just ignore it and learn not to be so uptight? I genuinely didn't think I was - the dcs shower with me and see me getting dressed - but I clearly am about this. Or do I say something to ds? I don't want him to feel cuddling is wrong.
DS has always likes squeezing my norks, and stroking them, especially when he is particularly distressed, tearful or sleepy. I think it is largely subconscious for him and a comfort as he did it while breastfeeding as a baby too.
i dont know as my ds is onl 17 months and when i bring him into bed with me in the morning, he wakes at 6, i sleep naked these days he likes nothing more than to tweak my nips! he was bf up to 14 months.
i jsut think it is a childs curiosity about the body. he also lifts up my top to touch my belly as he has been told there is a baby in there which there is.
it may be a comfort thing as ds rests his hands on my boobs and likes resting on them like pillows.
DS is also quite breast-interested (4.5) He strokes my tummy adoringly if given access, and has occassionally patted my norks. I have found non-verbal ways to tell him I prefer his mitts off my baps , and he's certainly clear (although I've never said anything) that it's not something to do in company.
He bloody loves it if I share a bath with him - I do feel a bit odd about that actually
I think at 4.5 I would start to introduce the idea that some parts of the body are private and not for touching, if you are uncomfortable about it
My 3.5 yr old is constantly cuddling up against my breasts and copping a feel. He even says 'Mummy, I love your big fat boobies!' quite loudly in public . I tend to either laugh it away and say 'That's a bit cheeky, you silly billy', or ignore it. He never really persists, and the few occasions when he has got a bit silly about it I put on my serious voice and remind him about people having private parts of their body etc etc. I think it's pretty natural to be curious, really.
My ds went through this faze BIIIG time at around the same age.
He used to say "Mmmmmm, mummies boobies" and snuggle up to them. It did freak me out sometimes so i get what you mean.
Mrs Mattie sums up how i used to handle it too.
Yep! Ds1 (also 4 1/2) doing this too. Hope it doesn't last too long.
Thanks everyone - will try your suggestions.
My two boys do this too, and the tummy! Ds2 is just 2 and he knows he can't touch my boobies as he calls them.
He greets them like old friends if we have a bath together "ah, booooobeeeeees" he tentatively reaches out to them and I say no touch, he then says "cuddle?" and leans against me to feel them squish against his body.
They are 36D in size so quite squishy, Ds1 also likes them but in a more subtle way, he likes to lay his head on them, clothed, he is 5.
Is this what I have to look forward to?! DS (2.2) is a total boob toucher. He gets in bed with me in the morning, immediately reaches down my top and says 'touch Mummy's boobs'. If I have the audacity to lie on my tummy, he gives me a firm prod and says 'TOUCH MUMMY"S BOOBS'.
He also likes to slot his hand down between my cleavage when I'm reading him a book.
I was hoping he'd grow out of it, but it looks like I've got a couple of years of it to come!
DD does this too, likes to put her hands down my top when we are cuddling. I just tend to move her hand without saying anything.
Did have a shock one morning though when I was getting dressed and she tried to lick one! when I asked her why she said she wanted to be a baby again and drink milk.
My dd (3.7) does this. So do a lot of her friends (with their mothers, not me!) They're just interested, it's not a big deal
You're evidently not alone Embarrassed! My DS (19m) gets such a cheeky look on his face when he's about to have a grope as I have given him a Hard Stare when he's done it before...but he also seems to het such a lot of comfort from snuggling up that I can't find it in me to be too hard on him! As 'twas immortalised in the seminary work 'Brimful of Asha'....everybody wants a bosom for a pillow!
My DD (3.3) loves my boobs - spent the best part of 1/2 hour yesterday blowing raspberries on them and laughing whilst we were reading a story. I don't mind in the slghtest (although we were at home, not in public).
I suppose it is down to what you feel comfortable with.
My dd (2.2) seems to need to hold onto one or both of my nipples to get to sleep! She was bf til 13 months. She always stuffs her hand down my top if she's feeling tired or upset, wherever we are, but I can normally push it away without her noticing too much if we are out. Bedtime tho she gets upset if I try to push her hand away, so I leave her to it. If she comes in while I'm in the bath she says, aahh booby, and pokes them.
But it is a big deal if it makes the OP feel uncomfortable. Children can learn that concept of nice touch/not so nice touch at his age. And my body/your body.
So I would just suggest you point out that you love big huggy squeezes from your ds. And make a point of hugging him regularly. But at the same time tell him kisses are for faces (and tummies to make you laugh!).
my dd was exactly the same debra. she's 3.2 now, & just last week started to go to sleep alone. in her own bed. me, dp & my norks all breathed a big sigh of relief .
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