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This is more under "BEHAVEMENT" rather than development! Not sure how to handle dd....

(9 Posts)
pinkbubble Wed 06-Aug-08 21:28:54

DD who is 8 was sitting on the floor this morning, when suddenly she said "Oh man, I just killed Bobbie!" I instantly stopped what I was doing and said "What!" She then repeated that she had just killed Bobbie!
Apparently she hard found one of those thunder fly thingies - you know the things that just look like a black line!

To cut a long story short, she made it a coffin, (she has carried it around all day, she made a song up for it and wrapped it in clingfilm as I told her she was too young to laminate. She has made a poem up and is in the process of making a prayer up. She has told me the funeral is next Wednesday, as she has heard from somewhere that funerals are normally held about a week after someone has died!shock

She went upstairs earlier for about 20 mins, when she came down I asked what she had been doing (not like her to do something on her own upstairs for that long!) - she told me she was looking through her wardrobe for something to wear to Bobbies funeral next week!

Has anyone elses DC gone through this stage over a tiny little insect, none of my other DDs have done this!

I have no idea whether to ignore or encourage -part of me thinks she expressing her caring side, another part of me thinks she is completely bonkers!

pinkbubble Wed 06-Aug-08 21:30:42

Oh and in the title that should say BEHAVIOUR and not Behavement!!!!hmm

singyswife Wed 06-Aug-08 21:33:30

I think you need to speed the funeral along or you will be burying a skeleton. I would go along with it, it is obviously something that she is working through just now for whatever reason. I would have a ceremony in the garden tomorrow (tell her insects need to be buried quicker). I remember my dd (5 at the time) and her 8yo cousin playing at viewing the body after Jimmy Johnson dies. We have had a lot of death in their young lives and I think they were just playing it out. They took turns at being the body and being the undertaker. We let them do it but left periodically to laugh uncontrolably

singyswife Wed 06-Aug-08 21:34:15

Should say died not dies.

pofaced Wed 06-Aug-08 21:36:27

I'd say she was just acting out details of a funeral she had read about in a book/ heard about from friend with dead granny....

play is how children deal with life and I'd say she'll be a fantastic coper at all of life's significant events... unless she's upset/ upsetting anyone else, let her at it.

It's not really much different than the teddy wedding my DDs had at the weekend/ christeningthey had years ago/ the attempts to bf teddies when they were toddlers/ pee standing up when they realised that's how boys do it

pinkbubble Wed 06-Aug-08 21:38:43

Think I might suggest that, Don't think I could quite live with the grief over a thunder fly for that long! She has even made a plot in the lawn, right in the middle because it is next to her favourite thing at the moment - the monkey bars!

Just wondered where all this came from, we have not had anybody recently die!

DD hates animals, but obviously has a soft spot somewhere!wink

pinkbubble Wed 06-Aug-08 21:39:54

She is not crying or anything, maybe she just feels a bit guilty of killing "bobbie!"

Northumberlandlass Thu 07-Aug-08 08:03:12

Apparently, as a child I did the same type of thing. Although I found a dead bee - I made a coffin for a match box (obviously lines with loo roll), then asked my eccentric grandparents if I could hold the funeral in their garden. They agreed and I made the family gather around, we had a grave dug and my mum told me that you sing hymns at funerals. I didn't know any so I sang God Save the Queen.

Sorry - that was slightly OT. But, my DS frequently holds ceremonies for dead insects / worms (he's 4.10)- I have to make sure they are dead first !!!

pinkbubble Thu 07-Aug-08 12:54:27

DD has just shown me her prayer! In her own spelling and words!

Dear God

I hope Bobbie gets to heaven ok.
And also I want make shore Bobbie comes back to me as ok.

Thank you

have told her it might be best to have the funeral today rather than waiting for a week, she is not convinced at the moment!

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