Talk

Advanced search

How do i get little one to like grandpa?

(9 Posts)
toddlerhip Mon 21-Jul-08 20:13:23

Grandpa is very big and tall with a booming voice. And he is very strict about things like not throwing food at mealtimes (e.g. would shout - until asked not to). DS (17mo) adores granny but has always been quite scared / wary / challening of grandpa and will not for example go happily into his arms. How do i get my litttle one to like grandpa?

Janni Mon 21-Jul-08 20:15:28

How are YOU towards grandpa? Do you hug him, kiss him, seem close to him or are you also a bit wary? I think little ones often pick up on how we feel towards someone to work out whether or not the other person is 'safe'.

harpomarx Mon 21-Jul-08 20:17:41

ask grandpa to relax a little bit. Oh, you already have...

I have a similar problem with mil. She is not booming but isn't half as cuddly and playful as my mum. Consequently dd is much more comfortable with her 'nanny' than her 'grandma' (mil). I really think it's up to the adults at this age to engage with the child, rather than the other way round.

But don't worry, Grandpa will probably come in to his own when ds is older - he will probably teach him to do woodwork or something (bit of a Werthers Originals scenario p'raps). I'm sure ds loves him just as much as granny but responds to him differently because he is a different type of person.

liath Mon 21-Jul-08 20:18:23

Golly, he does sound a bit scary. I don't think you can make a child like someone TBH - if it's upsetting Grandpa I'd maybe suggest he starts talking more quietly or he could resort to bribery with chocolate.

whatdayisit Mon 21-Jul-08 20:34:39

I think slightly scary Grandpas come into their own as boys get older. I bet by the time your DS is around 7/8 they're inseparable and by then you'll appreciate someone being strict with him, so you don't always have to be the bad guy smile

Meantime, can Grandpa be a bit quieter or do silly thing like peekaboo with him? Is Grandpa bothered by the situation?

toddlerhip Tue 22-Jul-08 22:33:41

I think grandpa is quite upset by it. Today for example he wouldn't play football with him unless i was there too. Later, I left the 2 of them in the car while i went in to pay for petrol and when i came back lo was in floods of tears. And if i leave the room with the 2 of them alone there's immediate panic and tears so it's quite dramatic. Grandpa's quite stoical and takes the line that if lo is left with him long enough he'll eventually learn there's nothing to be scared of (doesn't work). We do lots of kisses together to grandpa and he is ok around him if me / granny are there, but never on his own and hardly ever for cuddles. Grandpa does do peekaboo but when he does get angry it's pretty scary for anyone let alone a lo which is why i've asked him not to (at least while he's so young). Granny gives him 110% fun and attention, hence the difference. I will suggest the bribery!

toddlerhip Tue 22-Jul-08 22:35:36

I meant ds wouldn't play football with grandpa not vice versa. That's the hard thing, grandpa is willing, it just doesn't seem to work. Granny smiles and laughs a lot more than grandpa so maybe i'll ask him to cheer up a bit!

AbbeyA Wed 23-Jul-08 08:28:05

I think it will just take time-you can't change people's personalities. Grandpa may come into his own when your DS is older.

AbbeyA Wed 23-Jul-08 08:29:48

My DS2 used to cry everytime he saw his Uncle when he was that age-it was a bit embarrassing because we saw him quite often! He is fine now!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now