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DS rejects me sometimes for DP

(6 Posts)
Lovelove Thu 17-Jul-08 21:01:09

My 14 month old has always been a bit of a daddy's boy, but lately whenever both of us are in the room he seems to just want his dad. I work part time, spend loads of time with him, do all his meals, bedtime, lots of cuddles etc, but for some reason as soon as Dad is in the room, he'll almost be fighting to get out of my arms and into his. It really upsets me because I feel like I do more than the lions share of the childcare while all DP does is play, so why is this happening?? Anyone else have similar experiences?

lou031205 Thu 17-Jul-08 21:20:33

I think this is a normal stage. He feels safe that you will always be there. He can go to Daddy knowing that Mummy is available when he feels like it. My DD1 is 2.7, and she will ditch me in a heartbeat for Grandad envy.

iarel Thu 17-Jul-08 21:33:39

hi there. you have answered your own question unfortunately most our days are taken up by cleaning, feeding the little darlings and mostly being in charge of discipline. when my DH comes in my DS is all over him and all they do is play (hence the attraction!) also if he hasn't seen your DP all day, it's like having a new toy to play with. i wouldn't take it too personally. my DS is almost 7 and still switches allegiance when it suits him! while they play go and have a long bath, read a book or do your nails see it as a well earnt break. play with him during your time alone and when DP comes in just remember that he hasn't seen your son all day. if they have a strong bond now, count yourself lucky. what you'll end up with is a very balanced boy who not only has one person whom he's close to, but two.

Lovelove Thu 17-Jul-08 21:39:46

Thanks, its just very hard not to feel hurt and insecure about it sometimes!

Jux Thu 17-Jul-08 21:59:14

I think this is completely standard. Take pleasure in the fact that your child has two adults in his life whom he loves and trusts. The more, the better.

Jux Thu 17-Jul-08 22:10:08

x-post with lovelove - you don't need to feel hurt and insecure; it means you're a great mum and doing a good job. He is secure enough in your love for him that he can go to someone else - this is an incredibly important part of the attachment between parent and child and too many people forget it: the object of attachment is separation. You don't want him to be a mummy's boy when he's 25, do you? At this rate he won't be; he'll be well balanced and able to make a relationship with someone else while still loving you and his dad. That's what you want.

Well done!

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