mums of fussy eaters...there is hope!!!

[kitbit]

ds is 3.5 and has been very fussy for about 2 years, only eating a very narrow range of foods (plenty of them, but only 3 or 4 choices). Nothing has worked, I've been here a few times stressing about it, and I've received some lovely words of encouragement and hope (thank you!) plus tales of similar children who are now 6 and eating everything etc etc.

Well, out of the blue at nursery on Tuesday, ds tried frankfurters. He ate two whole ones . On Wednesday he tried spaghetti. On Thursday he tried chickpeas and today he tried rice . I am beside myself with joy and relief. He doesn't want to eat any of these things at home yet, but I don't care, it's a step forward and I was starting to really think it would never happen. We're a long way from eating everything and anything, of course we are, but he's made a breakthrough all by himself (in his own good time, in the same way as he always does!).

Just wanted to share, in case any other mum is in the same pit of gloom, worrying whether her child will ever eat anything other than toast and yogurt. Hang in there!

[porolli]

very pleased to hear it! hope it happens here at some stage

[DontCallMeBaby]

My fussy eater (who admittedly has been improving for a while) ate a prawn on Monday. She didn't actually like it, but the thing was that she asked to try it, chewed, tasted and swallowed it, rather that announcing 'I don't like that cos I never seed it before' as usualy.

[kitbit]

DCMB wow a prawn! It's a really big step just to TRY something. We've been trying to teach ds the difference between "I don't like it" and "I don't want it". Maybe that's helped a bit I'm not sure, but when I did frankfurters for tea the night afterwards he said he didn't want them. That's a big step too. THEN he said he would eat them "another day". I was gobsmacked, normally it's a blanket "no" and head buried in arms.

[kitbit]

..and porolli, me too! I'm sure it will. People keep saying to me "keep the faith", and finally a little breakthrough. Fingers crossed for you

[jollydo]

Here's hoping for a change from pasta, pasta and more pasta in this house! Thank goodness for ds2 who is at that lovely stage of eating everything. Good to hear encouraging stories.

[blueshoes]

kitbit, glad to hear that. BTW, my dd 4.8 has always been way more adventurous at nursery, now school, than at home. If your ds will do the same at home, that would be the next step.

I just send my dd in to school for her balanced meals. At home, it is stil mainly chocs and croissants.

[DontCallMeBaby]

Yeah nursery is a whole different thing to home (and I guess school will be too) - I remember being told that DD had eaten lots of her favourite, cheese and potato pie. What, I said, my DD? Who doesn't like cheese OR potatoes?

[supervixen]

Wow thats brilliant! there is hope for my dd yet then! all she eats is pasta, yogurts, bread and cereal and of course chocolate etc

[TheArmadillo]

well done - that is fantastic. SO many new foods. Sounds like you have made a breakthrough.

My ds tried chicken today - not only a new food, not only a protein source, but also meat!

Although his lack of interest in food means that I realsied the other day that I can now count his ribs through 3 layers of clothing

NO wonder he has no energy and keeps getting cold.

He is 3.something (7 possibly?)

[TopBitch]

I wish this would happen in my house. My DD1 barely eats. She is very underweight and has little interest in food. Its driving me mad!!!

[TREBUCHET]

Oh god I am thrilled for you and praying it might be catching. My ds is currently existing on strawberries and toast. I get so despondant when people think if I just starved him, or did something different it would all work out. makes me want to cry!

Innumerable people saying "maybe if you put veg in his mash..." drives me mad. The little monkey won't eat ANYTHING, won't even open his mouth!

OK rant over....

[Squirdle]

Oh fantastic

I am a mummy of a fussy eater [sigh] but things are improving very slowly.

DS2 (5) suddenly decided at 2 and a half that he didn't do all of the delicious meals he loved and has been fussy ever since.

He does love fish and eats cereal, bread, yogurt, cheese etc etc, but doesn't try anything new. However he has become a lot better in that at Christmas he wolfed down masses of roast potatoes (his fave now) and a couple of months ago started eating chicken

I know there are many things he would love, but he won;t even try! He'd love pasta, cottage pie etc, but getting him to try even a little bit is the equivalent of poisoning him as far as he is concerned! Vegetables are a no go.

My main problem is DH who thinks that DS should eat what he is given and that is the end of it. He also spends meal times nagging and getting cross with DS which we all know (and I have told him many times) doesn't actually work! That god he works away most of the week! I was told yesterday that I didnt actually wnat DS to eat properly

[kitbit]

I know what you mean about people and their advice - all the paediatricians we have seen (about 4 different ones over his lifetime) have said "don't offer an alternative, kids don't starve themselves you know". Huh, wanna bet? ds is a determined little chap. And after the episode of not offering alternatives in which he didn't eat for nearly a week (I gave vitamins and plenty of liquids etc etc obviously), it then took nearly a MONTH to get his appetite back up to normal on his old narrow diet. Did much more harm than good and could have jeopardised what had been very good health.
So I've learned to smile sweetly, even at MIL who is convinced she can "fix" him if I leave him with her for an afternoon. I think she thinks just slipping a fishfinger onto the side of his plate will do the trick! Got news for you, lady....

[kitbit]

Meant to say at you not wanting him to eat, Squirdle! Good grief. I have had "Aren't you at all concerned?" to which I reply "Yes, of course I'm bloody concerned, I just don't make a song and dance about it in company". grr

[Squirdle]

Of course I don't want him to eat properly! I love having battles at mealtimes, I love worrying that he hasn't had enough fruit and vegetables, I love listening to DH blethering on about him eating this that and the other! Blardy men!

I know DS doesn't eat as well as he should, but the things he does eat are good things. He doesn't have loads of snacks, and if he does have any they are generally healthy ones like breadsticks and cheese. I have been the one to coax him into eating other things, but it can take quite a few goes and a lot of patience. I try very hard to make sure he has a balanced diet on the few tings he will eat.

I am grateful for the amount he does actually eat and the things he will eat, but DH can't be happy with that as his nephews eat everything

[kitbit]

aaarghhh for you! You sound similar to us, ds eats very few different things, but does eat good quantities. Very lucky, many refuse altogether and I don't want to go back there again. A friend of mine is always banging on about how well her dd eats (very thick skin, my friend ) but it does remind me that ds sleeps well and is quite an even tempered chap, doesn't throw tantrums etc. It's swings and roundabouts, her dd throws herself on the floor every 20 mins and refuses to go to bed, but eats everything she puts in front of her. It's hard to stay philosophical when your child is hiding from his dinner plate yet again, but it really is six and half a dozen.

[Squirdle]

Exactly kitbit. DS is fab in every other way. He is such a sweetie and this eating malarky is the only problem we have with him. Boy next door is a horror (as I have experienced yet again this evening) and eats everything. I'd rather have DS than him.

[kitbit]

Me too!! (just got back from school - ds tried spanish tortilla today and lentil stew )

All those months of chanting "this too shall pass...this too shall pass..." may finally be coming to an end!! MAYBE. Not counting chickens yet, small steps at a time but am just so PLEASED for him. School gave him a purple sticker for good eating today, he is SO thrilled

[Squirdle]

Fantastic! You can tell him Squirdle thinks he is fab

I think at his age you can coax them a little more easily, but at 5 (and a stubbornish 5 to boot) it's a bit harder. Like I say though, I am getting there. It's DH who needs the training!

I mean i know why DH wants DS2 to eat well and it is exactly the same reason as I do, but he seems to want to force him to eat things, whereas I think it will never work if we force him to and make it an issue.

[kitbit]

aww thanks Squirdle, I will! He's just gone to bed (he had a star sticker on his home chart too for eating all his tea and is very pleased with himself, even though it was chips I felt it important to carry the wave!) I'll tell him in the morning, thanks

But don't you find it's SO hard not to get frustrated by it, I guess your dh just isn't able to stop himself trying to apply a "quick fix" whereas with my ds at least the "softly softly" approach definitely works best. Try and insist on anything and he digs his heels in and you've got a battle. Motivate him though and he'll decide for himself to have a go. I totally agree that insisting on food issues with his type of personality will just cause loads of problems and hangups and so long as he's healthy (he is) and thriving (he is) then I can persuade myself to be patient just a leeeetle bit longer!

[scattercushion]

Fantastic news kitbit. It must be in the water. I too have a fussy eater and today she ate frozen peas straight from the packet, which was a breakthrough. I thought 'what the hell?' - they're not cooked but they are green, which is a miracle for a dd who won't even eat green sweets in case they're veg.

[Squirdle]

It does get frustrating, definately, but like you say, get annoyed does not work. It has the opposite effect. DS2 is healthy and thriving, he is on the 50th centile for weight and height.

I think the thing with DH and I is that I seem to really understand DS and why he is like he is, DH doesn't. I have always said he will improve as he gets older...which he is albeit slowly.

DS3 is the same age as your son and will try most things (if DS2 hasn't already said yuck), but we are lucky with DS3 as his favourite thing in the world is fruit. He is a strange chld, he doesn't ask for sweets in the shop, he asks for an apple and DS1 is 14 so eats everything and more

[kitbit]

peas! that's brilliant, scattercushion! ds ALMOST tried them once due to the Charlie and Lola story ("I will not ever never eat a tomato") but he remembered himself just in time and announced there was no way I was getting him to eat one, green drops or no. Another reason I often have the TV on in the kitchen is because when he's distracted I can shovel more in while he's not thinking about it! ha.

Fruit's great Squirdle, here's hoping it rubs off on ds2! I too am holding on to the hope that by age 14 he will be a food bucket and eat everything in his path.

[Squirdle]

Yes, Charlie and Lola got DS2 eating fish, even though it was fishfingers, but now he eats proper fish DS3 however will still 'never ever eat a tomato' and we get 'don't be silly mummy, those are carrots, not orange twiglets'

DS1 did go through a fussy stage iirc, but he would always eat things like bolognaise and pasta dishes so i was very good at hiding veggies in them. He grew out of it and eats pretty much anything now...except celery.

[kitbit]

ooh, I can't wait till he likes pasta you can hide so much in it. He did used to like spaghetti, but had a tummy bug and threw up a spaghetti lunch so went right off it. Shame, I could fill it with veg but disguise with ketchup. I have been known to secrete little bits of broccoli in his yogurt in desperation!