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Best Friends... what do you think?

(3 Posts)
LissaQ Tue 04-Jan-05 22:33:30

DS is nearly 4 and has been going to the same nursery 3 days a week since he was 6 months. For the past 2 years he has been "best friends" with one particular boy (3 months younger). They were in different groups for 6 months at the beginning of 2004 and DS was miserable. Now this other little lad is leaving nursery. I'm really worried, DS lives for seeing him there and is confident and happy when they are together. There is one day when he is not around and DS is a different child, head down, no smiles, doesn't appear to join in and when I ask him who he has played with he always says "no one". (I've checked with nursery, it's true!). He has made a really strong link with this other boy and I'm concerned about how he'll cope. He's not one for groups, he definitely prefers a one on one relationship, all the others at nursery appear so bright and confident and happy to join in groups - I just want him to be happy. I should add I'm the one who thought glasses were the end of the world (he copes brilliantly, we're fine) and DS is the one who only eats sausage rolls. I'm starting to feel faintly neurotic!!!!! Any ideas?!

Twiglett Tue 04-Jan-05 22:35:31

is the friend leaving the area

can you make sure he has lots of play dates with best friend

and can you start to invite other children over .. ask who he could be friends with and help him to foster the relationship

it will actually do him good to learn to develop new relationships and friendships .. if he relies heavily on one person he can end up hurt

also I think I'd ask at nursery how they can help you manage the transition

LissaQ Tue 04-Jan-05 22:45:13

Thanks Twiglett - he's not leaving the area, we do already go to gym tots together and other mum and I have agreed we want them to stay in touch out of nursery (other little boy loves DS just as much), so will be arranging play dates. I know it's not an excuse but you know what it's like at nursery, you actually rarely get to meet other parents as all are picking up and dropping off at different times and usually in a mad rush. DS is a boy who likes routine and stability and this is going to rock his world. I will talk to nursery about it, there is one other little chap I could cultivate as a playdate, I know his mum, but problem is we both work - different days. Nothing is ever easy!

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