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Dilemma about comforters

(16 Posts)
blossom2 Tue 21-Dec-04 10:04:14

Advice needed on what to do about our DD's comforters.

From birth DD has learnt to go to sleep and comfort herself with some fabric dolls. she chews and sucks the dolls hats which (as you can imagine) get smelly and disgusting after only one night. I alternate and wash them everyday so that she has a clean one each night.

We've never tired to take them away because we could not bear not getting a good night's sleep. they are also a source of comfort for her and calm her down really well.

DH thinks now that she is 2yrs 8 mths that the dolls should go to Santa in exchange for presents however I think it may still be too soon. The reason being, that we've only recently moved to Paris and that i'm pregnant with number 2. I don't know if i could handle sleep training now.

What does everyone else think????

alilujahcatsg Tue 21-Dec-04 10:11:54

Is it really a problem if she just uses them at night? I'd leave it if you can because won't it be disrupting for her to have a new person in the house anyway? You may get lucky and she "gives" them to the new baby herself??

Issymum Tue 21-Dec-04 10:14:47

Noooooooooooooo! Don't do it. The words 'learnt', 'comfort' and 'sleep' say it all.

DD1 (3.10) is addicted to 'Teddy', but I would no more discard him than beat her with a stick.

Unless there is some health reason or it is massively impractical to let her have them, I would just go with it. If you don't like her sucking the hats, you could perhaps try sewing a second hat, in a different type of fabric, on top of the original one so that she is less inclined to chew on them.

nailpolish Tue 21-Dec-04 10:16:56

why would you want to take away something that is a comfort to her? my dd is 26 mths and has a blanket and a rabbit she would never part with at bedtime - im glad she has a comfort blanket. dont do it

WideWebWitch Tue 21-Dec-04 10:18:14

What's the problem?! I just can't see why you'd want to take away something that she loves and helps her to sleep, it's not even a dummy! Let her give them up in her own time when she's a much bigger girl.

WideWebWitch Tue 21-Dec-04 10:19:38

Why does dh think you should take them away? Buy some more if you can't bear washing so often. You don't need to get 'tough' with a nearly 3yo imo.

nailpolish Tue 21-Dec-04 10:23:00

agree - dont be tough on her. itll be hard for her when no. 2 comes along at times, and she will find comfort in her comforter! just because she is about to be a big sister doesnt stop her needing her comforts. and itll be too hard for you just now trying to change things - dont be tough on yourself either. shell probably give them up when shes ready

blossom2 Tue 21-Dec-04 10:40:22

Thank you VERY MUCH ladies. you've voiced my own thoughts and feelings.

DH actually asked me to post on mumsnet but i think he was hoping for a different response!!!

nailpolish Tue 21-Dec-04 11:18:56

maybe hes wanting her to grow up a bit because shell soon be a big sister. but hell be glad of the comforters when dd sleeps no problem when the new baby is around!!!

good luck with the baby btw, and im dead jealous of you in paris - i went there for my honeymoon and its my favourite place in the whole world!

blossom2 Tue 21-Dec-04 11:32:03

thanks nailpolish . I know DD will give them up in her own time - probably at her first sleepover party when she realised no one else has one!!!!

Paris is lovely and DH tells me we had snow this morning!!!! But living here is desparately hard especially as i don't know the language. I'm putting off having lessons because i've got terrible morning sickness and can only concentrate on sleeping at the moment.

Its a long story for another thread me thinks, but thanks again for the words of comfort

Hulababy Tue 21-Dec-04 11:38:42

Agree with others - why? If it is just a night comfort is it a problem? I think with all the excitement of Christmas and the other new things happening, it might be a more stressful event than your DH envisages. Also it might make your DD not look forward to Christmas so much if she things she has to give up her main item of comfort.

DD is same age (2y 8m) and has a dummy as a comforter most nights. Did consider getting rid of it but then sat adown and thought why? Why is it so necessary? What harm does it do? She doesn't wake up to retrieve it, and she doesn't wake p needing me to get it again.

nailpolish Tue 21-Dec-04 11:39:22

i can imagine how hard it must be with the language - but you are right to concentrate on you and the babes just now

WideWebWitch Tue 21-Dec-04 15:02:06

Well Blossom2, I think your first post was very neutrally worded so your dh can't even say we were swayed by anything in it. You are right and he is wrong, hoist with his own petard, hurrah!

LIZS Tue 21-Dec-04 15:13:31

dd is 3 yrs 3 months and has Teddy - comforter with a teddy head, brushed cotton triangular skirt with an overskirt. She is chewing her way through the blue overskirt (hem has now gone completely) but still relies on him at bedtime and crises. If anything she has got more reliant on him since the summer rather than less. As someone said, it hurts noone and there is no way I could just take it away. I do limit his use during the day if I can though.

Piffleoffagus Tue 21-Dec-04 15:17:18

Both of mine had/have comfort blankets, my elder child ds now 10 just left his when he was almost 4, he never thumb sucked but now aged 10 he still sleeps with the same teddy and pillow he had as todller.
My dd has a blanket which she cannot be parted from she is 26mths, I am thinking of cutting in half to preserve it so it lasts for as long as she needs, she looks like Linus out of Charlie Brown, always dragging it round
It gets manky we wash it, it gets manky again.
It is wonderful to be able to hand a baby something that gives instant relief

pooka Tue 21-Dec-04 17:17:38

My dd has a Noukie dou-dou (like a soft furry handkerchief with a donkey's head) and I love the fact that she has an instant cue for sleep time. Part of the whole bedtime routine is finding noukie, saying hello, snifing it etc. It is rather manky (but have two and was supposedly going to alternate but in the end each is as disgusting as the other - must put one in the wash soon). Keep the comforter. I think it's lovely for your dd to have a "friend" to snuggle up with at night.

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