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3.5 year old suddenly scared and clingy(3 Posts)
Is it normal for a confident 3.5 year old to be suddenly clingy and scared? My son used to be happy playing or watching tv by himslef while I did washing up or other stuff, but now he wants me in the room with him all the time. Even if he’s just watching a tv programme he wants me to sit in the room. He’s loving and happy to be with his dad when they are on their own but when Im around I have to do everything, he only wants me and wont even let his dad cuddle him. He also doesnt want to go bed suddenly because he’s scared of monsters. And is more tearful all together. Obviously the pandemic has brought lots of changes but nothing else has happend (pandemic has been here for months, his behaviour changed few weeks ago). Feels like we have a diffrent child in the house.
You're right the pandemic has created a lot of change for our children and it's hard for them when so young to understand it all.
There is a great book called Help my child deal with stress and thrive by Dr Stuart Shanker. It explores how we can identify 'stress behaviours' and ways to support the child by co-regulating. Here's my review on the book -
My son is 4yrs and wakes up most nights saying he scared of the dark. What we are wondering is if its about the dark or about feeling isolated - he likes to be with us. We're chatting to our boy about what could help without him feeling that his emotions are wrong. The Power of Showing Up book by Dr Dan Siegel talks about if they feel totally accepted without judgement, they will learn to listen and trust their emotions. Just got to think of ways to reduce those feelings! we're still not there yet.
Thank you I’ll definitely have a read. He’s always been so confident, it feels like having a different child. But I suppose the older they get the more they are aware of things going on around them and get more worried.