Why you need to be thick skinned for this parenting lark!

[jellybrain]

I was getting dd 2.2 ready for bed last night and started to sing her a song.This was our conversation;

Me: Twinkle,twinkle.....
DD: No STOP IT
ME: Little
DD: SToooop (very pained expression)
ME: don't you like my singing?
DD: Its too hobobul(horrible)mummy. Lets read a book shall we?

Well I did ask

[GooseyLoosey]

You do indeed. Ds's comment to dh yesterday was that "daddy, you aren't a mammal as you have no hair!".

[Carmenere]

Ah yes well I was taking dd(3.8) to a party on Saturday and hse pointed to my tee-shirt and said that I would have to wear something else because everyone would be able to see my 'boobies'. Now it is a bit low cut but not that bad..............
So I put a jumper over it and the little madam said 'oh yes mum that is much better'

Mind you this is the same child that regularly tells me if my clothes are too small when I try things on in changing rooms. and has done since she could first talk.
'no sma mummy, too sma' being shouted at you in TKMax changing room by a 2 yr old does wonders for you esteem

[ScottishMummy]

love this thread

[DoctorFrankenSquonk]

jelly - all three of mine put their hands over their ears when I start singing.

And have done since they were months old!








But it doesn't stop me

[jellybrain]

... ds1(10) in conspirational whisper;

Are you having another baby Mum?
Er, No!
Oh, your tummy's looking a bit fat(as he smiles sweetly at me while I breathe in and try to locate my abdominals).

[ScottishMummy]

aggghhhhhhhh the horror of it - could u speak as u were clenching your abdominals

[HerculesMorseAsBigAsAnElephant]

ds1 today: Mummy, your eyes are funny
Me: Funny?! How?
ds1: They're fattening
Me:

[pollywollydooooooooodle]

dd do you eat your crusts mummay? (black country accent)
me mmm
dd then why does your hair look like that?

(polly who has just come back from the hairdressers....)

[ScottishMummy]

im sore all this laughing...keep 'em coming

[jellybrain]

Could this turn into a competition to find the most brutally honest child? Off to pick up the wee monsters darlings now... will come back when they're in bed .

[ScottishMummy]

apparently as a child visiting a stuck up posh aunty i chirruped

Me:aunty are you posh?
Aunty: Oh no dahling why u ask
Me: Mum and dad said "you were all fur coat and nae knickers"

squawking and blustering as i was man handled out of there and told in car never to repeat what i overhear

[Paddlechick666]

me: shall we sing a song
dd (23m): yes!
me: ba ba black sheep
dd: NO! Shhh Mummy

this goes on till we find a song that I am allowed to sing!

altho at bedtime she begs and begs for a "rockabye treetops" which is unbearably sweet but man I hate that song!

and recently for some unknown reason she's started yelling "Mr Tumble" in Tesco.

[DoctorFrankenSquonk]

dd2 - "oh mum, not chicken again, it's eee-gusting!"

[EmsMum]

Suffice it to say, the combination of rosacea and a child does nothing for ones self-image.

[Flamesparrow]

I went shopping with DD (4) the other day - tried on a jumper

"No mummy. It doesn't look nice"

[ScottishMummy]

out of the mouth of cheeky monkeys terrors cherubs - dont you love it lol

[newgirl]

my dd went round telling everyone 'daddeeee is 40, 40 , 40 almost 140' all weekend - he began to get very grumpy

[milkymill]

Dd: " Mummy, you've got big boobies and I've got small boobies."

Me: Yes that's right.

Dd:" And when I'm bigger I will have big boobies like you. Will I have big eyebrows like you as well?"

Time to get the tweezers out methinks!

[Spagblog]

DD thinks I am severely uncool.

She has also on occassion told me to stop singing as "Its making DS cry and me feel sick"

[RedFraggle]

So glad I am not the only one who gets shouted at for trying to sing!

My DD's nursery sing a politically correct "baa baa white sheep" and so when I sing baa baa black sheep as I have always done I get told off by DD!
"Noooo! Mummy, NOT black sheep!"

[ArmadilloDaMan]

Ds (3yo) hates my hair apparently and wants me to get it shaved off like him and daddy. He also hates my clothes and wastes no time in telling me

HE'd prefer me shaved bald and naked I think.

[serin]

Made a vegetable crumble for dinner, now okay I invented the recipe but it wasn't that bad.

They all sat twirling their forks (DH included) until DS1 finally spoke for them all "is it sick?" he asked.

"Never mind" added DD "We still love you".

[colditz]

Ds1(4.5) "Oh Mum, you can't wear those jeans because your tummy has got SO BIG it doesn't fit inside them! AHHHHhhhhhahahahahahahaha!"

Vile boy

[colditz]

I have also been informed that I should be wearing my hair like DeeDee Doodle.

[Flamesparrow]

"Why do you have a fat tummy when Flameboy isn't inside you now" (Thinner than she has ever seen me!)

The best though is the withering look she gives my mum in the car and says "Don't sing Gran."