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What advice can I give DS?

(5 Posts)
PeachesMcScream Wed 03-Oct-07 19:38:44

DS is 6 and gets really very frustrated sometimes. With all kinds of things, mostly things he can't do or if he perceives someone else is being unfair. Now whilst on the one hand, this sounds like normal behaviour for a 6 year old boy, this conversation really surprised me:

Me "right let's try that a second time" (we'd just started his spellings for homework)
Him "I CAN'T do it!!!" Pushes paper away. Starts crying and says

"I'm feeling really frustrated by it."

It really surprised me that he'd expressed it like that, although I've seen him get very frustrated before, so I said

"Has teacher been talking to you about getting frustrated?"

Him "Yes"
Me "Why was that"
Him "Cos I don't like it when people don't play what I want them to"

I know for a fact if he doesn't get his own way he'll sulk a bit, and he gets really miffed if the other kids don't play the game the way he wants to, (to the point where he can't do anything due to pent up frustration and indignation.)

Sounds really rubbish now I write it down. But he does seem to have a bit of an ishoo with it.

What can I say to help him deal with these feelings?

PeachesMcScream Wed 03-Oct-07 19:50:25

Well I can't just tell him to get a grip, can I??? grin

Can I??? hmm

pointydog Wed 03-Oct-07 19:59:20

Accept his feelings, teach him words to express them (frustrated etc), talk about the feelings.

Then simple things like counting to 10 to help calm down. Deep breaths. Try again later. Get used to what it feels like to be cross, to calm down, to try again.

PeachesMcScream Wed 03-Oct-07 21:29:25

Thanks pointy, I know it sounds obvious to others when you say it like that, but it's all a bit alien for me, so I need it spelling out. I don't tend to "do" angrily frustrated (or at least, certainly not a couple of times a day as he is at the moment). Had visions of him going to anger management when he's older...

pointydog Thu 04-Oct-07 08:43:00

smile peaches

I think sometimes children's feelings aren't really acknowledged and they ahva to be before they can get over them.

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