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Rejecting the child rather than the behaviour?

(4 Posts)
WinkyWinkola Mon 01-Oct-07 14:47:08

I'm constantly leaving the room away from DS telling him his behaviour is naughty and that mummy will play with him when he stops hitting, kicking, scratching, screaming and jumping on his baby sister.

I'm doing this a lot because he has tantrums and ragesa bout everything from getting out of the bath to having lunch to of course, bedtime.

He's 2½. How much longer does it go on? And will he get a rejection complex?

I really feel like I don't like him at all at the moment and I"m so relieved when he goes to nursery. Then I feel guilty. Even more guilty.

Any help or tips or advice would be appreciated.

bossybritches Mon 01-Oct-07 15:42:46

Oh winky it's so hard isn't it?

He's just going throught the terrible two's & posibly jealous of his little sister too. You are doing the right thing, maybe you need to just look at what triggers the tantrums & se if there is any way round it. When my DD1 was that age we had terrible battles EVERY bloody bath time as she was tired. So we changed the routine & had baths in the morning (since we were all up at sparrowfart anyway!) then as she got older we made sure they were bathed & ready for bed BEFORE tea. Sounds simple but it made SOOO much difference. Still got the odd tantrum but it helps. Could you reserve some special time when DD is asleep to do something with DS that he likes particularly? Cuddle up & read a book or do some consruction? It's tempting to rush roound & catch up on chores when the babes asleep but it could be worth spending it with him & making it your "special" time.

FLIER Mon 01-Oct-07 15:53:52

Could you stay in the same room as him and ignore him? Just turn away from him and pick up a book/magazine. This will have more of an effect on him, as it will reinforce the fact that he/his behaviour is being ignored. Then as soon as he has calmed down, start speaking to him again, and don't mention the tantrum/bad behaviour, play a game or go out of the room with him and do something else.

cybermonkey Mon 01-Oct-07 16:15:55

I have no advice but I also have a question because my DS who is 2 is constantly throwing his toys and I do not know what to do, I have tried ignoring it and tried confiscating toys but how will he know it is naughty if he is not told. He is breaking quite a few toys now, got worse since we got back from holiday. WW I always feel guilty that it is my poor parenting and that he will not have skills he needs to go to preschool next year.

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