17 month old driving me nuts!

[kirstywursty012]

Hi everyone,

Hope someone can help. I have a lovely feisty toddler who just won’t let me do anything. I’m currently sat next to her as she plays bored out of my skull. I have SO much to do in the house. I have laundry that hasn’t been put away in weeks and I can’t remember the last time I hoovered but she won’t let me leave her.

I’ve tried sticking the telly on which she loves watching but only if I’m watching it with her. She then climbs all over me as she watches digging her limbs into me and pinching me.

I’ve tried bringing her into the kitchen with some toys when I’m trying to cook but she just chases me around wanting to be carried and crying.

It’s getting so tough because I need to work from home during the week because of this bloody lockdown THAT IS GOING ON FOREVER but I can’t leave her to entertain herself for even a few minutes.

Please tell me this is a phase! I’m so exhausted! She has one 2hr nap around midday but I use this to eat something and chill out (I know I should be using this time more productively but she is so intense the free time just runs away from me)

[ZooKeeper19]

Do you have a cot/safe spot you can leave her, even if she is not thrilled about it? I feel like leaving her while still telling her mummy has to do things but will be back might help. You would have to stick to it though.

Not sure how old she is/how much exercise you can provide given that you actually have to work (that does sound very rough tbh). Maybe try to make her tired somehow physically, so she can try to chill/be a bit less grumpy when you leave her to it to do some actual work.

I know my mum used me as workforce. Hold, fold, bring, carry, open, close... I helped with cooking, cleaning, laundry etc since I could walk (before I was 1yo). Obviously not a lot of actual help, but the baby was ebtertained and things got done. Maybe try incorporating her into the houseworks, see how she likes it.

[Newbiehere123]

My DS is high needs clingy teething older baby and I use his travel cot to pop him in there when I need to do things in the house. I set up the iPad, put little baby bun on from Netflix and it keeps him occupied for 20-30 mins. I use this tactic once or twice a day when I'm desperate let's say to go to the loo or shower if hubby isn't around or if I need a break or to get things done. I don't have the TV on anyway and it's probably the reason why little baby bun seems so appealing to him and new each time.

[Jannt86]

I think this is pretty typical of a 17MO tbh. They need a lot of attention and for good reason as their brains are developing immensely quickly and they need our help tuning that development. I promise it does get better though. Mine was similar at 17MO but now at 26MO she's still quite demanding of attention but she will play by herself and even initiate games etc without my input for short periods of time and will set and eat a snack or watch the lion king for the millionth time a bit of TV whilst I get something done. Something that does work well with mine is if I set her going with something eg playdoh and play for a few minutes and remind her how to play well with it then leave her to it perhaps with a task like 'can you see how many stars you can cut out for me whilst I get on with this hoovering' Put the work in now. These years are crucial. If she can't be left alone it's because she isn't ready yet. The laundry can wait and a bit of dust won't kill you but she will only be this little for a few short years just try and enjoy it. X

[veejayteekay]

hi there. im so sorry as im not sure how useful thisll be to say but please know that youre absolutely right that this is just a phase. i have a 20m old boy. ive been so indoctrinated by this stereotype of the "terrible 2s" that when difficult behaviour reared aroudn your LOs age I thoought I'd done something really wrong. i personally have found 17-18 months was a really really hard time. in reality it was about a 6 week phase that coincided with major teething and speech development which probably fed into it, but at the time it felt everlasting. the seperation anxiety was intense and i went from being able to leave to get something done in the next room for a few minutes to not being able to leave his side without incessant screaming. its just my theory but im convinced now im the other side of it that a lot of that behaviour is wrapped up in their frustration around speech - the more my LO has started talking, the less needy he has been or tantrummy. with mine it gradually faded out by about 19ms and now he is having some epic toddler tantryms at times but i would say actually better than when he was a bit younger. this too will pass i promise xxx

[Wherethereshope]

Can she help you with some of the jobs.. give her a little basket with her socks or something in to put in the wash.

At this age I used to prep dinners the night before so I knew I was winning and meant less stress. I do the same now when working from home with DS3..and make a picnic lunch so our focused time together is a nice play or a walk and picnic