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Siblings girl &boy.3.6 and 2.2 Helpso naughty.

(5 Posts)
mum2oliver Tue 11-Sep-07 19:19:04

My friends children are so naughty and she just cannot take anymore.
Girl (3.6) moans and whines all day long and cries her needs out.Doesnt talk properly and acts like a baby.When playing with HER toys if brother(2.2) even so much as touches them she shouts and screams at him.He then lashes out by hitting her.He doesnt communicae too well so gets eassily frustrated.He cries alot and will not attempt to explain what he needs or wnts.He is very clingy to his daddy and clings to his legs and will not allow him to even go for a wee without going crazy.
How can she discipline both of them?
She shouts alot and seems to get no where.She does lose control.

HonoriaGlossop Tue 11-Sep-07 19:55:06

She doesn't need to discipline them from the sounds of it. They need her to stop shouting and to clearly give them the boundaries, and give them a consequence if they constantly ignore the boundaries.

Sounds like her dd is acting like a baby for attention, and ditto with the not talking properly. Does your friend always talk properly and nicely to her daughter - don't think she can, if she shouts alot; how can she expect her daughter to learn what is expected in terms of talking properly if she doesn't get shown?

Her dd will stop much of the moaning and whining if A) she is stimulated and interested and distracted and B) she is not given attention when she is whining. Kids don't persist with stuff that gets them nowhere.

Again, clinginess in the ds is very very normal. Do you think her expectations of their behaviour are realistic?

It sounds like she is a bit all at sea. I really would recommend she gets sure start involved; they should be around locally, and they can help people with routines and general family life with very young kids. I think she needs a bit of outside help.

VoluptuaGoodshag Tue 11-Sep-07 20:02:11

Sounds like my two who are of a similar age (2.8 + 4). They antagonise each other a lot and vie for my attention. It can be very difficult when you are tired and sometimes I get overwhelmed by it all and shout a lot too, in total frustration. But I've started to spend a little more time with my DD (the elder one) on her own. I realised it's been a long time since we just had each other to ourselves. He is at playgroup and she is at nursery in the mornings now and it gives me a chance to recharge my batteries a bit and prepare for the afternoon onslaught of peace keeping. Today I made invention houses out of the sofa and tried to think of games which involve both of them. When they do have a skirmish I firmly explain (to whichever one is in the wrong) that it's naughty and not to do it and make them say sorry to the other. I've also just started allowing DD to stay up an extra half hour later than her brother so that's our special mummy and daughter time and we play one of her games that DS would just make a mess of. It's only day two but so far I've been feeling less stressed about it all and stronger in myself to deal with any situations.

mum2oliver Tue 11-Sep-07 20:24:19

This sounds much more realistic.People do lose it and do shout.She does speak to her children properly but at some pints has just had enough.x

Pitchounette Tue 11-Sep-07 21:03:36

Message withdrawn

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