Hypermobile 1 year old - frustration, sensitivity

[IB1988]

I've written about my hyper-mobile 1 year old daughter and her refusal to weight bare recently but this is a little bit more of a general question to see if anyone has and similar issues and if this is linked to the hypermobility.

My daughter is now 14 months old and crawls and sits up very well. She is generally a good eater, sleeps well and interacts/communicates with us. She is still massively struggling with weight bearing and hasn't yet stood on her feet unaided (or really at all). Her feet are apparently hyper-sensitive and so when we try and touch them or interact with them in any way, she becomes very upset.

Further to that, I am finding it more and more difficult to be able to let her just 'be' on the floor/playing with her toys. I put her down and normally she will scream and cry until I sit down on the floor with her. Of course, I love playing with her and spending as much time on the floor as I can in order to make her happy and comfortable. However, it's becoming much harder to do anything - get up to put the kettle on, feed the dog, make her lunch etc because the moment I stand up, she begins to get upset again. It's a vicious circle because when I pick her up she usually wants to go back to her toys and seems just as frustrated in my arms...I can't win!

I'm curious to see if anyone else has had this type of emotional sensitivity (hyper-mobile child or not) and if there are any tips or advice. She's been like this since about 8 months old but as she is not yet standing or walking, it feels as if the intensity of it has increased recently.

Thank you

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

No experience of this sorry OP but I can imagine how intense it is.

Is she under a Paediatrician at all?

[Witchend]

I've known a few children whose hypermobility has been picked up because they went to be checked out because they walked late.
So I would guess it probably is linked.

It is typical for them not to be wanting to be left, to want you on the floor with them etc at that age. I remember locking myself in the toilet for 2 minutes break

With #1 I tended to do as she wanted. By #3 he had to be left at times. What I'd do was call over "I've just got to put the dinner in the oven, I'll be back with you as soon as I'm done" or whatever. It helps their understanding, also helps them hear you talk and know they're not forgotten-and makes you feel better.

[corythatwas]

I had a hypermobile child who was also hyperanxious; turns out it's quite a common combo, particularly with Ehlers Danlos syndrom (connective tissue disorder which affects joints, skin etc in various configuration). Obviously, just not being able to do something you are developmentally able to do might be enough to make you sensitive in its own right. Not feeling able to trust your body is scary. But it may also be the connective tissue thing and the anxiety is connected in some chemical way we don't know about yet.

As Witchend say, it's also really common for children of this age without hypermobility to be very clingy. Constant flow of conversation helps. Making a game of any job you can do so she feels involved and not abandoned.

Dd didn't walk unti 18/19 months and went on to have joint trouble. As your lo grows, watch out for flat feet, unexplained pain, falling over for no reason. With EDS that happens because the ligaments are too weak to hold the joint together, so it bends the wrong way. Lots can be done with early intervention (such as supportive boots), so worth being aware of.

Also, really common for scars to heal badly and even slight pressure to result in enormous bruises- nothing to worry about, just to be aware of, so you don't think you've done anything dreadful.

Gentle exercise to strengthen the joints is good, but without putting pressure on them to "push against the pain". We found swimming very helpful.

Also found we had to manage expectations a bit, in terms of what she could safely do.

[IB1988]

Thanks so much for these helpful and supportive messages. @corythatwas really useful tips re swimming, gentle exercises and about EDS (which I didn't know about).
Thanks everyone
x

[surreygirl1987]

Hello! I don't have much advice as we have similar challenge but wanted to say as it sounds like we're in the same boat. My son is almost 16 months old and is hypermobile. This was picked up on by a physio a while ago thankfully as he had torticollis too from birth so he was in the physio system anyway so that's been helpful otherwise I would have had no idea he was hypermobile! He didn't bear weight at all until almost a year old - he'd just lift his legs if I tried to make him. Only st Christmas time when we got him a walker did he show any interest in walking whatsoever and it was then (at 14 months) that he began taking shaky steps while holding my hands. He's still not walking or even standing unaided but makes progress every week - today he even started running (holding hands) which brings a whole new level to trying to run before you can walk! He doesn't have the foot sensitivity you mentioned but his feet do turn out a lot - one more than the other I think, and I think this is why he is struggling. He's been discharged from physio since he started bearing weight but she said to get in touch if his progress stops. We'll give him until 18 months I think before we ask if we can see her again.
I'm not as worried as I might have been because my husband was also hypermobile and didn't walk until 18 months. It is frustrating though and he's a wild little active thing so I think he'll be much happier when he can walk.

What you said about being clingy and not wanting to be left while you make tea etc
... as far as I know that's pretty normal behaviour for lots if kids (?) ... We certainly have it with my son and I didn't think it was because he was hypermobile! It drives me a bit crazy though, especially when I'm literally walking two metres away to get him a bib etc and he freaks out 🤦🏼‍♀️