I feel like I can’t cope. I just need to talk to other mums

(5 Posts)
Sweetpea86 Wed 11-Dec-19 15:58:22

Hi, I have a 5 year old little boy and a 2 year old little girl. I love them with all my heart but I feel I’m failing as a mother massively. I’m sat in the living room with them crying while I type this. I picked my little boy up from school he normally has judo which was cancelled so I said we will go for a nice walk and shops. He kicked off so I said down home it is. He then went to kick off about that. My little girl then starts screaming and I just lost it and screamed at them both when I got home. My little girl shouting mammy crying for a hug. While my little boy was more concerned he didn’t get his own way. I work a lot of hours and feel guilty that I do. But I feel when I’m home my son plays up. He doesn’t seem to have any remorse I know he’s only 5 but I don’t know I guess some times I wish he could see I’m upset and work with me.

I just hate my self for getting angry again and housing at them. I ended up throwing my keys across the room because I’m awful.

I just wanted to vent. I don’t have many friends and I feel so alone. My hubby is supportive but I feel lost at the min. Parenting just never seems to get easier sad

OP’s posts: |
MayFayner Wed 11-Dec-19 20:54:19

I have a 3yo and a 5yo. They were off school and preschool today with coughs and colds. The whinging was constant. I was simultaneously bored out of my mind sitting in all day, and losing my mind with their constant demands.

Nothing to say about it other than I feel your pain.

wine

Londonmummy00 Thu 12-Dec-19 12:54:18

Sweet pea, your not alone. At all!!! I have a 3.5 year old girl who is throwing tantrums and crying for me and demanding every single day. My 6 year old has meltdowns at school and I dread picking him up to hear how he’s misbehaved yet again at school, after yet again another heart to heart chat this morning about behaviour.

I haven’t chucked keys across the room. I have however smashed up some of my sons Lego in anger last year after yet again he was in trouble for destroying someone’s project on purpose. I asked him how does this feel if I did this to you. Not my best moment.

Mine fight. They fight in the car while I’m driving, I sometimes feel I’m going to have a car crash! I cannot fully concentrate or think at all when they are arguing, squabbling, throwing their show and tells around.

I also feel I’m going out of my mind sometimes. Friends don’t always understand, they seem to have angels, or older kids or newborns- not many people who are in, or will ever admit in real life, they are in my situation.

But... some things do help. Getting them out (with my husband so it’s a child per adult!) , lots of downtime at home, relaxation. I’m forever rushing mins around in and out the door/ to and from clubs and school. They are shattered. This cold wet miserable dark weather doesn’t help.

I’ve found mine have the worst behaviour during the Christmas winter term- the weather, darkness, excitement of Xmas, plus the weird Xmas school play feelings- on edge, excited, nervous all at the same time.

I’m looking forward to all the god damn presents being opened up in January, Xmas out the way, sweets eaten and a more chilled out relaxed time.

We are ALL exhausted to be honest.

Londonmummy00 Thu 12-Dec-19 12:57:18

By the way, each morning I set out that today will be a new day- but usually within even the first hour someone is in time off. Certainly within 2 hours. And if I don’t shout they don’t listen however hard I try. Sometimes they might. It never lasts though. Sometimes we separate them then it’s better.

Kit532 Thu 19-Dec-19 19:33:29

I have a 21 month old and a four year old. I’m here reading your post because I googled how me shouting would damage my children. Picked up my boy from Reception and got home, no one listened to me at all. I shouted so much, felt so frustrated. Just things like my 21 month old turning the kitchen light on and off whilst I’m cooking tea, asked him repeatedly not to and he did. It feels like they only listen to me when I shout my head off! In the end I cried, got them both in my lap for a massive cuddle and apologised a lot for my behaviour. I feel exhausted and lost. I’m a student nurse and so tired, I feel awful because they seem to be on the end of my tiredness and frustration.

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