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"Naughty" 2yo(7 Posts)
My lovely DParents occasionally look after 2.5yo DS and they've recently taught him the word naughty.
I didn't want to use a naughty label in the first place but what's worse is they keep using the word for normal behaviour or silliness. Now EVERYTHING is fucking "naughty". He'll say it before he throws something or hits me or the dog. He'll wag his finger at me "naughty mummy". It's really winding me up!
It doesn't help that in recent days his behaviour has actually got naughtier, he didn't tantrum much and now he does more often.
I can handle the tantrums, but when he gets told off for bad behaviour and then continually repeats said behaviour I can feel myself losing my rag. He's throwing or hitting things all the time!
How do I stop it?! He's just not listening. Or when he does, and looks me right in the eyes, says naughty and then chucks a toy across the room wtf do I do?
Sorry this is so long, apparently I needed this vent.
Just looking for a hopeful bump?
He's finally down for a nap now - though they're getting to be a struggle too - he still needs one otherwise he's so grouchy.
I'm on the same boat with ds. My mil uses that word with him for everything and I actually spoke to her that I didn't really like that word. I was cringing when I told her but she respected it except everyone around us uses it so now he does too. He really plays up to it too. His behaviour is getting worse and now shout over everything. I'm tired!
I have no fix but I find ignoring and or walking away is more powerful than anything especially when you can see they're trying to draw you in. Then as soon as something positive happens reward with your attention.
We use naughty. But usually when it's very bad behaviour and describing what sobe body has done, not usually in the moment, we say "not very nice"
Ie, hitting isnt very nice because it hurts so and so. We should use our words instead if we are angry.
But this usually has no effect until we sit on the step until I think she's cooled down enough to listen, have a cuddle and say sorry for x y z. And if she can't, we sit again for longer until we can.
Perhaps you can implement some different words so he understands when it's time for discipline?
I hated doing the step and walking away and putting her back on "super nanny style" but I tell you, it worked for her when shit gets real and I'm at my wits end. Now she does as she is told 9/10 if I suggest the step if she doesn't behave better 😂
Hope you find a way to manage!
Naughty, is when a child still continues to ignore or disobey what was asked. Dont forget they are still learning, so quite right to start off "thats not nice". Now lets jump forward a year or two; baby in push chair with 5YO told to hold the handle, but disobeys and jumps into the road. This must not be allowed to happen, but lets say it has and you've got away with it this time, you have got to almost frighten the toddler to ensure it does not happen. OK I can see some of you saying get a double-buggie or tandem. But to be safe your child MUST respond to DO NOT LET GO, or the word NO, or DO NOT THROW THAT? Nothing wrong with the word naughty, and nothing wrong with discussing the problem when they can understand. I hear mums saying he never used to do that, which is why you start having child boundaries young, as a child develops, they challenge more, but it will be less painful if you having been saying "No thats naughty while very young"?
Basically he's learnt a new word and he's associating it with certain behaviour. It's not actually a bad thing, it's just kids learn through repetition so he's 'practicing' what he's learnt.
Praise good behaviour, ignore bad unless it's dangerous in which case remove the danger but don't make a fuss. This stage will pass.
Before you know it they'll be a nine year old screaming they hate you because you've disconnected the WiFi 😬 (me tonight)