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Tell me what to say to DS1

(12 Posts)
NAB3 Wed 15-Aug-07 18:37:21

He is 6 and often says mean things to DD, age 4. Things like I'll get the dry towel, you won't at bath time. I am having a story, you aren't. Don't do that you naughty girl. I am sure you get the message. I really feel like saying whgo died and made you boss!

popsycal Wed 15-Aug-07 18:38:39

join us on the how to talk thread

Desiderata Wed 15-Aug-07 18:40:23

Then say it! 6yo's are notorious for this sort of behaviour. It won't damage dd ... she'll get used to it. We're programmed to understand at a very deep level that our siblings are bastards who have to be tolerated

Tell him he's a bossy little tyke.

fawkeoff Wed 15-Aug-07 18:43:22

dd is exactly the same....ive put "be nice to little brother" on her reward chart to see if that works

NAB3 Wed 15-Aug-07 18:58:15

I'm sure I want her to get used to it. Making it so she expects it, thinks she deserves it?
Have tried so many charts but will do another one! If it helps it is all good. Thanks.

NAB3 Wed 15-Aug-07 18:59:04

popsycal, where is it?

NannyL Wed 15-Aug-07 19:07:52

my nearly 5 year old charge can be the same to his nearly 2 year old brother....

The result is that when he says I will be 1st I make sure he is last...

If he said i would have the dry towel... no he wouldnt, he would be got out last and made it quite clear that he had the wet towel!

Today we were queing up for an ice lolly, and little brother was bending down, big bro tolsd him "GET UP" , and i quiye promptly told him that I am looking after them both and its up to ME NOT him when he his brother does or doesnt stand up!

popsycal Wed 15-Aug-07 19:07:53


NAB3 Wed 15-Aug-07 19:13:46

Read most the thread, thanks. Sounds great. DS1 doesn't seem to know how he feels or why he does the things he does. I have tried relating it to how he feels when he is picked on at school and that is how his sister feels, but no light bulb going on there. He is a bright kid, too.

Desiderata Wed 15-Aug-07 19:35:21

But 'tis normal! Sorry if I offended by my post, but all siblings go through this. They have their own, separate dynamic.

<slinks off to another thread>

NAB3 Thu 16-Aug-07 17:36:45

You certainly didn't offend! To be honest I did say who died an dmade you the boss but he just looked at me. He has spoken quite harshly to his sister today and I have sent him to his room for it.

fawkeoff Thu 16-Aug-07 17:40:55

well i took all of yesterdays stars off dd{she saturated the bathroom with her cousin} today and she was devastated......then she tidied her bedroom when i asked

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