19 months DS Headbutting! Help!

[Theodoresmama]

Hi Guys,

So I'm a little bit of a loss and looking for some advice please.

My 19 month old son has just started showing some concerning behaviours. Myself and his other mum separated in February and we share custody. She has been complaining of some behaviours that I have only just seen today.

Theodore and I were playing bricks (no distractions) he pointed for another toy, when I said let's put these away first, he walked over to me and head butted me! I didn't react, mainly though shock! He then pulled my hair and slapped my face. On googling this behaviour, it says that the child is like looking for attention however that can't be the case as I was sat on the floor with him playing toys, no phone, no tv etc.

Is this due to the separation, what can I do to help him? Will the behaviour go away? Should I speak with his health visitor?

Thanks in advance xxx

[Kle209]

It sounds to me like he’s doing it out of frustration. I expect that he wanted the other toy NOW and tidying up wasn’t what he wanted to do so he lashed out. Essentially he had a tantrum, it was just a violent one aimed at you.

My 19month old does the same sort of thing when he’s not getting his own way, and I’m still with his dad so I’m sure it’s an age thing rather than due to your separation. Please don’t blame yourself!

I normally just say ‘no’ and try to distract him with another toy/snack/song etc. Sometimes I do cry out (sometimes he actually hurts me so hard not to!), but def staying calm helps in this situation.