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Sick with worry - ASD?

(4 Posts)
Lolly2803 Sun 25-Aug-19 22:35:17

Hello, I’ve written on here before about 6 months ago with concerns about my twins but especially DD. So I have 25 month old twins born at 33 weeks. Both are not yet talking. My DS babbles and chats all day long and is trying to say certain words and fill in the gaps in songs etc it’s just not crystal clear. He’s getting there. He will point things out to me as if to say what’s that? He’ll show me an aeroplane in the sky (but did point late. Only in the last few months. Prior to that he would bring me toys to show me, bring me books to read. And still does. He will look at me for shared enjoyment and has excellent eye contact and responds to his name. His pretend play is limited but I can see it coming. He will bring me a cup of tea. He brings me the phone to put to my ear and I showed him how to feed teddy a cup of tea and he will do this. He is super active and energetic!

My DD however is also behind in her speech but I see less signs emerging. She doesn’t try and say things. Or point out what things are. She wouldn’t show me a plane or bring me a toy to show me. She has poor eye contact although does give it and limited shared enjoyment. She loves nursery rhymes and will laugh with me and look st me when singing. And sometimes at other times too during other games. She will play peekaboo and will copy sometimes. She doesn’t always respond to her name. Never seen her pretend play apart from being me a phone if I pretend it’s ringing. She can focus on something she enjoys for quiet a while. Can be distracted but definitely has a strong focus. Likes toys that involve building towers or putting something in. She puts flash cards in a box. She will thread beads through shoe lace. Read books. Build towers. Put people on the bus etc. I’ve started private speech therapy while we wait for referral.
I’ve also got an appointment for DD with paediatrician with view to get referral for ASD. But just wanted some opinions here on both of them. Does ASD mean she’s destined for a hard life. Never marry, never have children etc? I feel torn between positive mum who’s going to fight to the death to get her as much help as she needs to fulfil her potential. To absolutely heartbroken. I’ve also got a new baby and am worried incase she has the same issues. Please help and advise.

OP’s posts: |
HennyPennyHorror Sun 25-Aug-19 22:50:30

Honestly? They sound like they're doing well....they really do. My friend's son has ASD and I could clearly see if from about 18 months...I know all children are different but he certainly never laughed at nursery rhymes or played peekaboo. He's 8 now and very verbal...has friends and interests...talks as well as his peers but in a very formal fashion. He didn't speak at 2 either...BUT I'm pointing this out because at the same age as your DD and DS he certainly was NOT pointing, playing peekaboo or laughing at nursery rhymes.

Your DC were born at 33 weeks and it does impact children. My nephew was born full term...he never said a word till he was over 3...not a Mama or a Dada..nothing. Then he began to say the names of tools and flowers and after that...full conversations. He's 5 now and nothing wrong at all.

As for your question about ASD meaning she's destined for a hard life. When we have children we want the best for them...we all do....ASD or no ASD....some children have an easier ride due to no disabilities but life is unpredictable no matter who you are.

My friend's son who has ASD is a very happy boy. He's always invited and included by kids at school....lots of friends. He's happy. He will go to a specialist school for high school...his opportunities may not be the same as others but they will be tailored to his needs and abilities...and he's happy.

Mummy0ftwo12 Mon 26-Aug-19 06:16:21

Speech and Language delay isn't always due to ASD, my DS didn't point until nearly 2.5 prior to that he would hand lead and use my hand as a tool, no words until 3 and pretend play was also delayed but he doesn't have ASD.

Lolly2803 Mon 26-Aug-19 07:14:34

Yer I don’t think my DS has ASD but I think my DD does. But there are a lot of things she does that don’t fit etc. She will look at us and Olay clap games etc. She does make eye contact like if she’s happy on the swing etc. And when she is playing with us.
But she definitely prefers to play alone and isn’t bothered by other children. Whereas my DS loves other children.

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