Bad attitude from my 6 yr old is breaking me

[bunnyone]

I can’t believe I’m the only one who has to deal with this but I certainly feel like I’m the only one amongst my friends.
My six-year-old is nearly 7 and her angry emotional outbursts are becoming worse. The thing I find so hard to deal with is how rude she is to me: the backchat, the rude words (she thinks they’re really rude but they are just minor words, but still, she’s trying to hurt me), her snarling face - and regularly telling me she doesn’t care about me anymore sometimes she says she hates me.

I’ve tried reward charts like her four-year-old brother has, but she just gets upset when she says he’s got more stickers than her. And it doesn’t change her behaviour. She is often very sorry an hour or two later but it happens again the next day.
I guess the main problem is I can’t stay calm any more I am at my wits end and there is nothing that I can take away from her that she cares about. I’ve banned her from sweets, television, parties.... she just says she doesn’t care anyway.

Half the time she’s lovely the other half I wonder what I’ve done to create such a vicious child.

There is a chance she might have ADHD but it’s not been diagnosed we have just started the process.

I just want a happy family life 😥😥

[bunnyone]

Guess I am alone then!!

[Bethyo]

I have no words of wisdom, but just want you to know you are not alone. I'm going through almost the exact same situation with my 6 year old son and I too am at absolute breaking point.
I've been in tears so many times today and just feel like I'm a terrible mum. Hopefully we will find a way through this and come out stronger xx

[bunnyone]

Thank you for replying!
I just don’t know what to do - it’s so hard. I hope we both get through this horrendous phase soon xx

[Sorryandstressed]

We're going through it too. 7 year old DD is vicious. Lies, screams and is generally obnoxious. Nothing is ever good enough for her, but she's positively angelic at school and at the grandparents.

Can't offer advice, just

[bunnyone]

Sorry to hear that :-(
Who knew parenting would be this hard. I often look at my friends who seem so happy and are genuinely enjoying their kids company. I have days when I just want to run away.

[PotteringAlong]

I don’t know the answer. I’m taking my 7 year old to the dr’s tomorrow because I’ve seen this behaviour from him before and having grommets fitted basically stopped it overnight.

It’s not all day, it’s not that long, but for the last few weeks we’ve had at least one angry outburst a day and he can be vicious when he’s angry. He’s fine at school.

I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, I don’t know how to fix it. I would quite like to give all 3 of my children away at the minute. I miss DH. We’re in the constant throws of parenting small children and never seem to have any time.

I’m hoping his hearing is really bad again because if it isn’t then it’s just our parenting and I don’t know what to do.

[Sorryandstressed]

One of those days in my house! Could happily sell all of them. Theyve fought constantly from 5.30 am!

Spent all day out doing fun activities and 7 yo dd has been miserable all day

[Daisy155]

@Sorryandstressed hi did your daughter change after this post she sounds like my son an angel everywhere but at home with us!

[freespirit333]

My DS is like this OP, and he does have ADHD (diagnosed). I can only assume it’s related to that.

He can be so rude, always seems to have a back chat comment to everything, and is always on the wind up/looking to annoy me. It’s exhausting.

[freespirit333]

Just noticed this is an old thread 🤦🏼‍♀️

[Daisy155]

@freespirit333 my fault I am looking through threads for answers especially old one because I am at my wits end his behaviour is starting to cause tension for us all! We never feel relaxed as a family even when we are doing nice things together! I’m hoping to find out if he will ever get better!

[littleteapot86]

I have similar issues with my seven year old son and have started to wonder about asd or adhd although interestingly we do know he has glue ear so it could be hearing related too.

[bunnyone]

Well I had all but forgotten I wrote this original post - but I can recall being at my wits end. My daughter is now 5 years older and has been diagnosed with ADHD. To be honest I think she also has ODD. Life is different, we have learnt to be more tolerant, but her behaviour is still extremely challenging. The only difference is that we know she can’t really control it and we have to be more accepting. It’s especially hard as she is now struggling at secondary school,
and the only help the SENCO suggested was putting her on medication. I am now considering removing her from school as I don’t want to medicate her just to conform to the educational system designed for neurotypical children. I just hope that when she grows up she knows we tried everything we could to give her a happy childhood: sometimes I feel like we’ve failed her.

[freespirit333]

So sorry to read your update OP as that sounds really difficult. You haven’t failed her.

Would it be worth at least trialing medication? My DH also has diagnosed ADHD and medication has been life changing for him. We’re looking to medicate DS on school days at least.

[Daisy155]

@bunnyone thank you so much for the update and I am so sorry to hear of this and like @freespirit333 has said you haven’t failed her at all it’s so hard seriously!

I really do believe something is wrong with my son now he literally can’t control his behaviour! He is becoming more and more argumentative and today I almost cried because he literally lied about something so insignificant and it tipped me over!

He doesn’t listen to any advice and I am so worried he is 7 and really tall for his age people are not going to look at him like the cute little boy he was.

if he continues to behave like this I really don’t know I am going to contact the Gp tomorrow and also try to change his diet significantly because he likes eating sweets and at school he comes home with loads every week!

sorry just ranting on I am so fed up and I love him so much I miss just being his mum without all this stress and negativity:(

[bunnyone]

@freespirit333

So sorry to read your update OP as that sounds really difficult. You haven’t failed her.

Would it be worth at least trialing medication? My DH also has diagnosed ADHD and medication has been life changing for him. We’re looking to medicate DS on school days at least.

@freespirit333 thank you - yes I think we may have to consider medication. Didn’t want to but it may help her, as much as it helps us

[bunnyone]

@Daisy155 definitely see the GP or try the school nurse. She was the one who actually referred my DD to get an adhd diagnosis. GP didn’t help us.