Please help!!! 3.5yo still wetting pants multiple times a day, 1 year in

(4 Posts)
Calixtine Tue 02-Apr-19 17:12:48

I’m at my wits end with DD. She’s 3 and a half and has been potty trained for a year now. The first month or two were great, no issues at all, but ever since then she wets herself (not a full wee, just enough that pants and tights/trousers need changing) 2-3 times a day, every day.

It’s not that she doesn’t realise she’s doing it — she chooses to wet herself rather than stop what she’s doing and go to the toilet. She knows exactly when it happens but she doesn’t tell anyone, and she always denies needing to go when you ask her, even if she’s hopping around obviously desperate. She kicks up a massive fuss about going almost every time.

I’ve tried taking her every hour whether she needs it or not, sticker chart with treats (worked for the first week then she went back to exactly the same as before), putting her in leggings or PJs after an accident (she prefers dresses), killing it with kindness, getting cross... I feel like I’ve tried everything going and she’s still as bad as ever.

I have two other preschoolers including a 6-week-old baby and could reeeeaaaalllly do without changing my 3.5yos outfit multiple times a day, plus all the extra (smelly) washing it generates.

Please help!!!!!!

OP’s posts: |
TigerQuoll Tue 02-Apr-19 21:47:46

Make sure when she does it she is taken out of her activity and made to contribute to cleaning herself up. If she can take her pants off then that, have a shower, put the clothes in the washing machine and hang up any clothes in it etc. So it is more trouble to wet herself than just go to the toilet. At the moment it is easier to just wet herself.

Calixtine Wed 03-Apr-19 09:19:17

Thank you Tiger. I’m trying that in combination with stickers again today, fingers crossed!

OP’s posts: |
needanappp Wed 03-Apr-19 12:53:15

I was going to ask if anything in her life had changed recently and then I read "6 week old baby". I genuinely think that may be a big factor.

My DS was 27 months when DD was born. He had been potty trained day and night for nearly 4 months and was golden with it. Soon after she was born he had a massive regression. He was wetting and soiling himself multiple times a day and we were nearly tearing our hair out! It was terrible trying to keep up with the washing!

What worked for us was completely ignoring the accidents and massively praising potty using (as you would when you first train them). It tends to be an attention thing. Even if you're making the effort to have one on one time with her, as I did with my DS, it can still happen. Once he learned that actually doing this doesn't get me any attention at all, good or bad, but using the potty for him a massive positive reaction, the accidents just stopped after a week or so and he was back to being completely trained!

I've heard from others that this was the most helpful approach for them too so hopefully it will work for you!

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