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help me sort out ds1's behaviour

(37 Posts)

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chipkid Sun 08-Jul-07 20:56:17

what age is your ds1?

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chipkid Sun 08-Jul-07 21:00:40

my ds 6 is like this. It takes hundreds of requests to get him to do the simplest thing and I end up yelling I get so frustrated.

I try to think of a consequence for not doing something-like the other day when he refused to tidy up I tolf him that he would go straight to bed early with no story as if I was going to tidy up I would do it in his time and not mine-it did work in the end!

I sympathise hugely as it is so frustrating.

Maybe going back to some form of reward system is the best way

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aviatrix Sun 08-Jul-07 21:35:32

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rattleskuttle Sun 08-Jul-07 21:37:50

agree with aviatrix

frazzledfairy Sun 08-Jul-07 21:42:46

oh my ds is like this too, but i'm knackered and can't post now but wil return tomorrow!

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Tortington Sun 08-Jul-07 21:45:04

i wouldnt have gone to soft play.

why should he do anythng if he gets rewarded anyway?

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Clary Sun 08-Jul-07 21:48:43

I took DS1's K'nex (much loved b/day pressie) off him the other day when he kept doing sthg I asked hime not to.

I said he could have it back if he was good. The next night he wrote three thank-you letters in about 5 mins (major achievement for him) and helped me clean all evening. I realsied later it was to get the k'nex back, but hey - it worked! What does yr DS really like tmmj? Can you threaten to take it off him (or maybe he can't go - eg to Beavers/swimming/judo club) then you must carry out the threat - and then give him a chance to redeem h/self too.

aviatrix Sun 08-Jul-07 21:50:39

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Tortington Sun 08-Jul-07 21:52:01

but MMJ - you need to show him your commitment to discipline - to him it looks like its when its c onvenient - i think with hinddsight which is always easy - you should have said to friend " trez sorry but i just can't come he has n#been naughty"

pisser o#about the adult fcompany - but i assure you unless you have strong ccommitted ground rules this shit will dominate your life - so short term it will be a fucker but long term to your advantage

aviatrix Sun 08-Jul-07 21:52:46

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pigleto Sun 08-Jul-07 21:53:55

Does he have pocket money? I use the trick of saying "I am coming back in two mins - if you haven't started I will dock 50p from your pocket money and then 10p a minute after that until it is done" I have the money in my hand so he can see the coins too. Ds is addicted to a magazine and he can't afford it if he doesn't get his pocket money so it works a treat (so far).

aviatrix Sun 08-Jul-07 21:55:09

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peachypie Sun 08-Jul-07 22:01:47

Hi yes i can sympathise here had a similair situation with my 5yr DS ( 6 next week ) I can tell him to do something several times before he does it and i get sick of the sound of my own voice asking and was finding i was resorting to shouting, not good.
He comes up with every excuse under the sun, " just give me 5 more mins" pretending he hasnt heard me - or complaining about it thats its not fair" so now if i ask him and i know he has heard me I say right i will count to three if you havent done it before then there will be big trouble! So far I have only ever got to 2 so have not had to come up with some 'big trouble'. I havent actually figured out what the 'big trouble' is yet so fingers crossed, i wont have to

Or there is always somekind of reverse Psychology ie: I told him to go upsatirs and brush his teeth he went upstairs then came back down and said he had done it. I knew he hadnt so said what a lovely good boy you are doing as you are told for your mummy, well done son. Then i heard him go straight back up and the tap went on and those lovely brushing noises started.

aviatrix Sun 08-Jul-07 22:25:12

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