5 year old still in nappies at night(11 Posts)
Hi there, I'm hoping for some advice on how to get my 5yo out of wearing a pull up at night.
DS has been potty trained since 2.5 which was straightforward. Took a few days and never an issue there and very few accidents. However, well over two years later we are still struggling with getting rid of the pull up at night. Struggling in the sense that DS is fine with the idea but still wets the bed. A few things we've tried:
- limiting liquid intake before bed and at dinner time. Usually about an hour before bed. Or am I cutting off too late?
- we always get DS to go for a wee before bed which he does.
- yet he still seems to need to go again in the night but he sleeps through it.
- quite often, he doesn't even realise and can sleep through it which makes me feel awful as I'll only know if his PJs feel damp in the morning.
- sometimes he wakes up after he's wet himself but he doesn't wake when he feels he need the loo.
- for a while we also tried the dream wee. So carrying him to the loo a few hrs later around 11pm and getting him to go when he's half asleep. Couldn't continue this though as I tend to sleep early and go to bed an hour after they do at 9pm and also because DS would get upset at being woken to be sat on loo plus he's heavy to lift.
DS recently turned 5. It's not that he isn't willing. He is. He just seems unable to know when he needs the loo when he's asleep and he always seems to need to wee again in the night even though he goes before bed. I'm worried that still being in a pull up at night is training his body somehow to relax and go if that makes sense.
Not sure if this is relevant. He's a deepish sleeper in the sense that once asleep, you can change him, switch lights on and tidy room, watch TV and he won't wake.
I have another child and never had this issue.
Or am I worrying too much? Everyone else I know at this age were out of pull ups at night a long time ago!
Thanks very much in advance. Any advice most welcome!
You are right to be concerned as by this age he should be dry at night but that is an ideal not the norm there are plenty of kids older than your son that aren't dry at night. Could you ask his go to refer you to a continence nurse? They could offer support.
I don't think it's a huge issue, I know my eldest brother wet the bed till he was 7. I think they say limiting liquid intake prior to bed can make it worse, maybe just give him something to sip at least. Sleepovers with friends would be unusual before 7 anyway.
I am replying to this because I do not agree with MumUnderTheMoon at all about it being right to be concerned. Nighttime drynesss only comes with the production of a particular hormone. We have had 5 children none of whom has been dry at night by 5. Often there is a familial tendency to "late" dryness. No doctor will bother much about a 5 year old being wet if he or she has never been dry - primary enuresis. It is a different matter if a child who has been dry starts wetting again - secondary enuresis - which may need help or treatment. My advice would be to relax, not to pressurise a child in any way about something he really can't help in any way and thank Heaven for modern nappies or a good washing machine! If you look through Mumsnet by searching you will find the same story repeated time and time again - you and your son are in a far from unique position and, I assure you, it does pass, and the very strong odds are that you will not have a teenager in night nappies.
No need to be concerned. No continence service will consider it a problem until at least 7- I suspect if there are no issues during the day then he's just not yet producing the hormone he needs to go dry over night.
Thanks everyone for your responses which I have found both helpful and reassuring.
As recommended by a poster above, I'll have a search for similar threads. I wasn't aware that hormones had anything to do it.
Fingers crossed this happens soon. Really reassured to know that it isn't uncommon for a 5yo to not be dry at night yet. Nobody I know has had this so I thought perhaps it was my fault somehow.
It's really not uncommon or Drynites nappies wouldn't come in big sizes. I suspect in real life, many parents don't talk about this due to shame or fear that their child will have the piss taken out of them. What a previous poster said about hormones is true. Medically you wouldn't get any help until after age 7.
The Eric website is very good. I would start there. Alarm pants might be worth a try. They worked with my son who is also a deep sleeper.
The only reason we had continence input at this age was because DD2 also had issues with constipation and faecal incontinence so they were seeing us anyway. By the point they saw us we'd pretty sorted the soiling typically - but at that point they were happy to help us with night dryness if we wanted to go down that route. We didn't at the time.
Few months later when I was fairly sure it was just a habit thing with DD2 we did go for an alarm and while it took a bit longer than the norm to hit enough of a run of dry nights in a row to remove the alarm - we've not had a wet night at all since. She'd just got into the habit of waking slightly up, peeing in a pull up and nodding back off - like you describe she is a very heavy sleeper (child is 90% sloth). I was fairly sure that was the situation and she wanted to give it a real go as well - I'd told her if she came out of pull ups she could have the money we'd spend on them on playmobil! If she'd been in the slightest bit upset by it all I wouldn't have done it when we did.
DS was also in pull ups at night at 5 - I think we finally got him out of them at 5.5. Until shortly before that the night pull ups were soaked every morning and he slept like a log, but once they'd been dry every night for a month or so we went without and, bar a few accidents, it was fine. Weeing before bed helped, but I think it was only circa 5 and a half he was able to wake up to go to the loo - we spoke to a specialist nurse and she said sometimes it takes a while for the hormone that wakes them up to go to the loo to kick in.
I definitely feel more reassured now. Thanks everyone!
Geneticsbunny, thanks for the website. I'm going to check it out now.
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