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End of my tether with 9 year old son

(2 Posts)
wonderstuff99 Sun 13-Jan-19 12:05:55

I literally don't know what to do with my son anymore,his attitude towards and the way he speaks to me is so horrible. He asks me a question which isn't clear so I ask him to clarify,he gives me attitude. I ask him to do something,he gives me attitude. He lies to me. He's been horrible to his step sister over Christmas - little digs to put her down,little mutterings under his breath. Yet he adores her and misses her loads when she's not here.
I've been in tears twice in the past ten days because of his behaviour, I havent been that upset since was in an abusive relationship with his dad.
I've tried giving him more responsibility, spending time 1-2-1 with him, giving him extra love,being stern...literally don't know what else to try.

My partner had a word with him today,I've taken away all his technology and told him we're going back to the start - that everything has to be earned back now and that attitude and lies will not be tolerated. But I'm skeptical this will even work. His behaviour at school,is fine,it's just the immediate family he seems to treat like crap.

This morning,we were meant to be going for a run together and I've arranged for us to start a family martial arts course. But I've not reached the point where I don't want to spend time with him as he's just not nice to be around.

Please tell me this is all salvagable

OP’s posts: |
JiltedJohnsJulie Wed 16-Jan-19 19:19:27

Honestly, I think it’s pretty normal behaviour for a 9yo. They seem to like trying out the phrase “being a little shit” to the extreme.

I can clearly remember asking DS’ two teachers for some advice and them being completely dumbstruck when I said how he was behaving at home.

It does get better, it really does. Keep calm, be consistent. Pull him up on bad behaviour every single time so he knows you won’t tolerate it and come and join us in the Preteen Section smile

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